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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My ex (22/F) and I (23/M) recently broke up, trying to pick up the pieces.
POST: My ex and I broke up about a week ago. We were on a "break" for a month while she went on a Birthright Israel trip. When she got back, she said she was with someone else and she didn't want to be in a relationship with me anymore. We had been together for almost a year.
I understand why she didn't want to be with me anymore, we have been having problems connecting and haven't been able to move past our issues. When she would bring up problems, I would ignore them or push the blame onto her. I got so comfortable with our relationship that I took her for granted, and didn't put the effort needed to move past our problems. The worst part is we were so good for each other, but because I was such an insensitive jerk to her she thinks I'm a shallow asshole and doesn't want anything to do with me.
I understand that now, and I tried telling her but she is completely checked out. I tried writing her a poem and getting her gifts to show her that I care and want to be a better boyfriend to her, but it was too late. She's moved on, and I'm left heartbroken. I haven't been able to focus on my classes, get sleep, etc.
The problem is that we have a lot of mutual friends. She lives with people that she met through me, and now I'm struggling with how to cope with this. I feel not only have I lost her, but I'm losing my friend circle as well.
How do I deal with this? It's consuming my life at the moment. How can I show her that I want and can be a better person to her? And how do I deal with our mutual friends?
TL;DR:
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Ex and I recently broke up, trying to show her that I want to be a better boyfriend to her. Also would like advice on how to deal with our mutual friends scenario.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [17M] Gf [16F] 1 year , see her daily
POST: Lets call her Sally. Sally is a really shy religious girl, and we dated for a year, but she broke up with me back in early February. I really liked her, we have the same interests, like the same sports teams, in almost the same classes (not planned) but more importantly in the same sports. We even got second at our homecoming for best couple. As it is the spring now, I am running track, and so is Sally, we are both distance runners. Because of this, we practice together and usually sports are where i can let off some steam but this makes it a bit harder. I do want to be in contact with her, however possible, because right now we are avoiding each other and it is really difficult.
I have two ideas of why we broke up. One being from what her sister texted me after we broke up. She told her family she wasn't comfortable when we cuddled on the couch together, but i am not sure thats true, because she gave me plenty of signs of enjoying the attention. Sally's family is super religious though. Second guess is that sometimes during the relationship, I would freeze up and not know what to say. I know her family really liked me, because they told me. I have a track meet coming soon and im not sure if i should maintain no contact, (currently at 6 days without texting her) or if i should talk to her. I still think about Sally every single day.
TL;DR:
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I see Sally every day, and i want to make repairs, I have a track meet coming very soon and would like some advice
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SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: REDDIT: is it okay to someone out when they are a customer at your workplace? how do you do so if it is?
POST: I have a long-term manager's position at a video store, and a customer of mine comes in at least three-four times a week. We often end up talking for a long time whenever he comes in and seem to have similar interests, and last night we talked for about ten minutes straight. I'm REALLY bad at picking up on social cues of the dating sort, and so I'm not quite certain whether or not he's similarly interested, but I think it's possible. So my question is a two-parter:
1. Is it wise for me to ask out a regular customer? I like seeing him come in, and would rather be able to carry on our casual conversation than risk him never coming in again or our interactions being awkward due to my creating a situation.
2. If it is okay, how do I even go about doing so? Do I ask for his number? Do I give him mine? Do I just come out and be blunt about it or do I try to be subtle and suggest something friendly like hanging out?
Your advice is much appreciated. I recently got out of a relationship I'd been in since my sophomore year of high school, and am hopeless when it comes to dating.
TL;DR:
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I like a customer at my workplace, and am uncertain whether I should ask him out, with no clue how to possibly go about it.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Mom found boyfriend's "online diary"...
POST: A little backstory: my boyfriend and I (20M, 18F respectively) met online through a mutual friend about a year ago. We became very close friends online. During all this time, he had a tumblr that he would use to write about his life. Needless to say, it was pretty personal. Late March he came visiting my town and we basically spent the weekend together. (This wasn't the first time we hung out together, I visited his town a couple of months before to tour the college that I would eventually choose to go to)
He wrote about this in detail in his tumblr. Including the times we both toked and went to a rave together. Fast forward to now, a couple of days ago we both confessed our feelings for each other and subsequently started going out. Just now, however, my mother sat me down and told me she had discovered his tumblr and began lecturing me on the poor life choices I made. His tumblr is full of profanity and my mother now knows about all the things I did with him. She told me to stop talking to him, and never mention that she found out this information. Another note, I just graduated high school and even though we currently live 4 hours away, I am moving to a college that will make us only an hour away during the school year.
I don't know if I should tell my boyfriend. I know my mother already HATES him, so even if we continue to date, I know I would never have my mothers approval. I really am torn, I don't know what to do. Please, can anyone give me advice?
TL;DR:
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Mom founds boyfriend's online tumblr detailing activities we've done. She now hates him. Wants me to stop talking to him. What should I do?
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SUBREDDIT: r/pettyrevenge
TITLE: Teaching a lesson about parking to an asshole
POST: Been lurking here a while, first time posting. Also, posting from mobile, sorry about possible formatting issues.
Anyway. I live in a small apartment building with a small parking lot. Not assigned parking, but there's enough spots for everyone with a few to spare. Most people have trucks or SUVs that can handle snow and ice well, while my fiancee and one other person have small cars that don't handle it as well. So when it snowed 8 inches on Monday, we knew this would be an issue.
My fiancee and I grab a snow shovel when it stops snowing and shovel out a chunk of the parking lot, just enough for the two cars to park in since I'm a nice person and I figure the trucks/SUVs will be fine. I toss down some ice melt, even shovel out some of the main area people drive in to help getting in and out. Takes about an hour and a half total.
Everything is fine for several days. We come home from the store one day, and lo and behold, a SUV is parked in the shoveled part. I knew it would happen and it's fine. I'm not that petty, we'll just park next to them. When we get closer, I notice that not only did they park in the shoveled bit, but they parked in the MIDDLE of it, blocking both spots we shoveled. Really dude?
I tell my fiancee to park next to them and hop out of the car. She instantly gets what I'm doing, and slowly pulls in as close as possible. I have to give it to her, it was a beautiful parking job. If it hadn't been an SUV, their mirrors would have overlapped completely. Her mirror cleared the drivers side door by probably an inch or two. Amazing.
A few hours later, I'm out smoking when I see the same SUV pull into the lot. I grin, knowing they had to climb through, and when I hear their apartment door close I decide to check up on their parking job. Props to my neighbor, they're a quick learner. They parked completely away from the shoveled part and haven't parked in it again since. Success.
TL;DR:
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SUV parked like an asshole in spots I shoveled snow out of, so I parked like an asshole next to them. Revenge was exacted, and they learned not to do that again.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: Your thoughts please? 18/m
POST: Alrighty so I just got out of a 3yr relationship and for my thought it was awesome but apparently not to the other half (18/f). I had my time to think and we ended on a good note, she is going to school, I'm gonna work. What I didn't expect was how much of a lost guy I would be, I feel super alone and my mind is playing crap on my heart. I have a bit of a thing for a friend 20/f who is dating one of my old highschool buds. I don't talk to him anymore but I talk to her a lot and we have had some.. Interesting talks but that's all. Now I wouldn't mind more but out of respect of him I wouldn't do anything, but this loneliness sucks and she admitted that if she wasn't with him she would like to be around/with me and see what would happen. I just want advice for a lonely guy that doesn't party, meet new people or go out much. Help settle my thoughts.
TL;DR:
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broke with 18/f of 3 years, 20/f has come to my interest but I don't want to approach even though she has given my fragile likeness a push.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: [23/f] Is he (26/m) just keeping me on the hook?
POST: What's going on here? It started out as a summer thing. We left it unfinished and ambiguous b/c he got his first military assignment 3,000 miles away. It's been 8 months since we've seen each other. We called and texted everyday for 3 months and then frequently for 2. We tried to arrange visits (he offered to fly me), but our schedules have made it really tough and those fell through.
Now it's really irregular. He often doesn't respond, but occasionally calls randomly. Or he'll be mia then text me unsolicited "Awkwadoodle, I wanted to tell you I was leaving, but wasn't allowed. I've missed you. Hope you're well, and hopefully me being home and safe is enough." It sounds like BS, but it's not that unlikely. Only thing, I hardly know what he's up to anyways lately that I wouldn't even know if he was gone.
It's just frustrating. I feel strung along sometimes, but what's the point if he has no reason to suspect we'll see each other. And, for me, I'm having a hard time letting him go. Like, 8 months later after only 5 weeks of even knowing each other?! Also, I wonder if this isn't just obsession because he's out of reach, and we parted in the height of a honey moon period. I feel like there's something here, and I'm willing to give it a try. But I don't like feeling like this.
And, I haven't known whether to just leave it be or to say something (if so, what?) or to move on (if so, how?).
TL;DR:
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knew him 5 weeks, 2 weeks actually together; have been separated for 8 months but contact is recently sporadic and I just can't tell if I'm just being strung along. need outside perspective.
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SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Have you ever been brutally trolled by a random stranger, in a way that was a huge hindrance to you, but having absolutely no benefit to them?
POST: When I was 8 years old, I worked as an extra in a movie with lots of soccer fans in a huge stadium throughout the early hours of the morning. Lots of very bored and tired kids and teenagers. Myself and the fans standing immediately around me were lucky enough to be near an amateur magician who amazed us with an assortment of card tricks. One was very simple: He picked up a card, showed it to us, put it back down on top of the deck, clicked his fingers, and the card would have changed. It was a very very skilful execution of the [double lift]
I asked him how he did it. "Well, I've been doing card tricks for almost 20 years now. I have a deck of cards in my hands 24/7. Watching television, on the phone, I'm always shuffling the cards. If the deck becomes as familiar to you as it is to me, *the card will change for you*.
I went home, and shuffled the hell out of my cards for a solid week.
TL;DR:
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Magician told me the incorrect solution to do a magic trick. Spent a week shuffling cards over and over.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: Need advice on whether or not to try to contact a girl...
POST: Okay so I recently moved to a new town and don't have very many people to hang out with. There's a coffee shop that I kept going to for about a month or two and there was a cute girl that always kept a conversation going with me. She had a bunch of aspect about her I liked and she even somehow seemed nervous around me! But anyways the last time I saw her I was in a hurry and as she was putting the cash in the register I just walked away and said "Thank you, keep the change!" She looked a liittle disappointed. But anyways ever since then I haven't seen her there. I never asked her out because I was waiting to start my new job first. Maybe I'm just incredibly unlucky and she changed her work schedule and I happen to not go every day she works.
So what I'm wondering is if I should ask the other baristas about her? Maybe see if she just started working at another coffee shop? I'm really bummed out that I missed my chance to ask her out. I should have done it sooner. And I'm not sure if asking about her is kind of weird... For some reason we never exchanged names completely. So I'd probably just be asking about "the redhead that used to work here". Is that weird?
TL;DR:
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Don't know if I should ask the workers at a coffee shop where a girl that doesn't work there anymore went. I'm not sure if that would come off as weird..
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [26 M] with my GF [25F] of 4 months, her friends found my old Hinge profile.
POST: So I used Hinge in the late spring/early summer, but then started dating my current girlfriend V. Everything has been going well up until this weekend.
Apparently, her friend B found my Hinge profile, which, may i reiterate, has not been used in months. To make things worse, one of the pictures on my profile is "a recent picture". Not sure how recent since I 1) haven't been on there, and 2) have no pictures in recent months without her in them.
Now V thinks I'm a cheating bastard when that's the furthest thing from reality. How can I prove to her that I haven't been on there?
TL;DR:
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Her friend found my old Hinge profile, which I had deleted off my phone when we started dating. She now thinks I'm cheating
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SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by doing what r/TIFU warned me not to do.
POST: I feel like a fucking idiot. Something something didn't happen today.
Me and my girlfriend browse Reddit all the time. We read the r/TIFU front page almost every night before we doze off. Thank for giving us hours of entertainment, r/TIFU.
Anyway, a couple of nights ago, I cooked a fucking AMAZING dinner for my girlfriend. You should've seen this shit. Fried shrimp that I spiced myself with all of her favorite ingredients. Garlic, pepper, lemon, and I even seeded a couple of jalapenos and threw the fresh seeds in to make them extra spicy, just like we both love. Throw in some homemade sweet potato fries, and a spinich salad, and I've made the most delicious and sexiest dinner ever. If I was a white girl I would've Instagrammed that shit.
We ate together and she's telling me how much she loved the food. She kept commenting during the meal that it was amazing. I was fucking proud of myself. I've made some pretty decent meals in the past, but this one was fucking epic.
Fast forward a couple hours, and me and my girlfriend climb into bed. Once there, sexy times commence. We're both really into it. After some rough and tumble, I finish and it's my turn to pleasure her. So, without hesitation, I start fingering her. She's moaning and enjoying it for a few moments... until she utters the words I never thought I'd ever be scared to hear:
*"Do you still have jalapeno juice on your fingers?"*
Ten seconds later, she's running out of bed, and jumping into a cold bath. I hung my head in shame and embarrassment.
I read a story exactly like this among the top of all time on this page... I should've known. I know it's a story you all have probably read before, but in the moment I felt like I fucked up royally (and ironically) enough to warrant a post. Not to mention, my girlfriend said when she climbed out of the tub, *"Haven't you read enough TIFU to know better!?"
TL;DR:
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Made an awesome dinner for the gf, fingered her with spicy hands and might as well have shoved a jalapeno in her clam.
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SUBREDDIT: r/self
TITLE: [40m], 10 years of marriage, 2 little kids, counselor told me lose weight and get a divorce
POST: Long story short, our marriage counselor told me in an individual session that it looks like that our expectations for our relationship are just different. Wife and and I had sex twice in 4 years, she doesn't even want to hug me anymore. Counselor pretty much told me literally, lose weight, don't tell her why, but in a year make a decision how you want to proceed. Kids will be OK.
I'm struggling with this, married for 10 years, went through a LOT, wife had breast cancer etc, infertility, now we have 2 beautiful little girls we love with all of our heart.
But we have 0 feelings for each other. Whatever I had went away due to the constant 0 engagement on her side. At this point, kisses feel awkward. It sucks. I am craving contact with another woman, I'm probably close to cheating if the situation would arise.
I've expressed all this to her. We've been to counseling. She says she doesn't like the counselor, I'm guessing she told her something she didn't like.
She told me we could be in separate bedrooms until we can figure it out. Wth.
I feel like my hand is being forced. But it takes 2 to tango. "It's dead Jim" is written all over this one.
PLEASE SHARE: Anyone else in this type of situation? Please share, I really could need some support in this, or at least I'd like to know that I'm not the only one.
Thanks.
TL;DR:
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relationship is dead, counselor told me to hit the gym and maybe get a divorce in a year, please share similar life stories so I know I'm not the only one.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [28F] accused my sister [23 F] and\or her fiancé [25 M] of stealing from me
POST: Okay, so here's the back story. My husband and I are living with my mom while we're trying to buy a house. My sister, her fiancé, and two small children also live here. I work 12 hour days (2 days on, 2 days off) and my husband works 2nd shift. My mom and sister's fiancé work 1st shift and my sister goes to college.
When I go to work I leave my purse in the trunk of my car. My keys are with me at all times except when I run to the bathroom or when I go on break, at which time someone is at my place. If someone at work took my money than they would have had to have known that I keep my purse in my car, get to my keys, go out to my car, and put the keys back - all without being seen.
When I get home at 5am I don't always get my purse out of my trunk. I sleep during the day with my husband and we don't get up until after noon.
Anyway, 2 weeks ago I had $100 go missing from my purse. Yes, I'm sure the money was there and I didn't spend it. It could not have fallen out. And because I don't get into my purse évery day I have a six day window on when it could have gone missing.
My husband is quick to blame my sister's fiancé. We have a problem with his drug use (and he went to jail for a few months for selling it three years ago).
I brought the subject up to my mom, carefully and delicately tonight in her room. My sister overheard us and is now super angry at me. I don't know what to do. Please help Reddit
TL;DR:
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$100 missing from my purse. Accused my sister's fiancé of stealing it. Sister overheard me and super pissed
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [21 F] with the guy I like [22 M], how do I ask him not to put his hand around my neck during cuddles/sex after a psychological trauma?
POST: Hello /r/relationships!
I met a guy a little over a month ago on a dating app and we've been talking a lot. We like each other and have a lot in common. We plan on meeting next month as we live in different cities. We have sort of drunken sexted yesterday (that's something I wanted to avoid before our meeting, but fuck it, it happened and can't be erased. And it was actually fun!)
He told me how he wanted to put his hand around my neck then kiss me. I'm fine with the kisses, but not with the hand around the neck as it reminds me of a time I was hurt by someone I cared deeply about. I started therapy half a year ago and it helped me tremendously, but I can't deal with this gesture yet.
I remember a fling once put both his hands around my neck to kiss me, and I couldn't help but to push him away because it felt awful. He then asked me for an explanation, and I guess it was way too early to open that emotional backpack of mine. I don't want to repeat the same mistake.
Can you guys advise me on how to tell him to avoid touching me there ? When should I do it ?
TL;DR:
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Sexted with a guy I like, and I don't know how to ask him not to put his hand around my neck as he had suggested, because PTSD ensues.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I (31M) fucked up a friendship (25F).
POST: I (31M) fucked up a friendship (25F?). I'd thought I'd misread cues she was interested in me for more, we'd been hanging out for months, at her apt watching shows, chatting, drinking wine, etc. I had a long talk with her few weeks ago, she was surprised, but it seemed to end fine, we were gonna be go on being friends. Though it wasn't the smoothest talk, it was good enough.
Ever heard of WhatsApp? Within a week of this I dumbly made a group called "girls" including her in it and like 10 others. Guess i wasn't over her and did i mention i am dumbass? The way it works it immediately notifies everyone and of course the title. I just wanted a way to organize ppl, what I got was the most embarrassing moment of the year. Hurray... Some forgave me easily, some didn't care, some I haven't talked to, but she's turned cold to me now. She'd texted me the next day WTF, I'd said humbly apologize, but it doesn't work. So that convo combines and magnifies this incident significantly.
I guess she thinks I'm a sexist disgusting pig now, she's turned down meeting recently to talk it out. I think everything I'd ever done awkward is now heavily biased against me suddenly. Before this I'd like to think I portrayed myself as mostly a good gentleman.
And we're both volunteering for the same group. So it just makes it that much more difficult to do anything now. Before this we both really enjoyed each other's company for the past few months, we'd shared wine, swapped personal stories, joked, constantly checked with each other we're not bugging each other.... And the group otherwise has a great relationship between everyone.
I'm sitting on an email ready to send. I don't think it'll work. Basically it asks if she's willing to throw away the entire friendship we've built up to now, apologizes again, reminds a thing or two we really liked about time together, says I just want to resume the friendship as we'd said before this.
Any advice?
TL;DR:
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I fucked up. Great friendship seems ruined by my dumbass brain making group convo with bunch of women. They see title. How can recover this situation with her?
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SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by attempting to promote an article critical of rich people on Facebook.
POST: My brother and I run a two man online magazine in our spare time. Often, we will promote the articles via the Facebook page for our magazine. So far, we've never had any trouble paying small sums to get our articles sent to a few thousand people, and usually there is little to no response to them. Although we have high hopes for our endeavor, at this point it's basically just a blog that gets spammed a lot and that few seem to be interested in reading or responding to.
In the past weeks, I noticed a few articles appearing on my Facebook feed that use tax data to estimate that one has to earn only around 350 grand a year to be in the top one percent of income earners. I talked to my brother about it, and I decided to write an article critical of this approach and use of the term "one percent", arguing instead that "one percent" ought to refer to distribution of wealth and not annual income. After writing and editing the article, I posted it to Facebook yesterday and attempted to "boost" it for $20. Facebook rejected our request to promote the article, saying: "Your Post wasn't boosted because it violates Facebook's ad guidelines by making claims that are unrealistic or unlikely. The post remains published, but it is not running as an ad."
I guess you shouldn't try to use a social media site owned by a billionaire to take pot shots at billionaires.
See the article here:
See the rejection here:
TL;DR:
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Wrote an article critical of the "one percent", and attempted to promote it via Facebook. Facebook denied the request.
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SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by trying to adjust/loosen my belt in the elevator of my workplace
POST: I needed to use the restroom, and decided to bring my water bottle with me to get some water too (from the break room, which is on another floor). In the elevator, on the ride down, I realized I had buckled my belt too tight. Since I was in the elevator alone, and since I had 3 floors left, I decided "what the hell, why not?" (I didn't think anyone else was at work since people usually get off at about 4:30 PM where I work.)
**This is where bad shit happens.**
In the process of trying to loosen and re-buckle my belt, I dropped my water bottle. I scrambled to pick it up while continuing to buckle at the same time, but I couldn't do it fast enough! The door opens and my manager and HIS manager are standing at the elevator door. At this point, I had already been leaning over, and they probably wouldn't have seen my belt unbuckled if I just sort of pushed through them while still hunched over, *but my dumbass decided to stand up straight and awkwardly say "Hello!*" I pushed my undone belt into the belt loop as best I could, hunched back down to grab my water bottle, and quickly walked out of there.
TL;DR:
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Tried to loosen my belt in the elevator. Shit goes wrong. Got caught with my belt undone by my manager and sr manager.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I think my boyfriend has Adult ADD. I need some help!
POST: I will keep this short an simple.
We've been dating for about a year and a half. I'm 22(f) he's 21(m). We're planning to move in together this summer once my lease is up. I'm just worried about his lack of independence/life skills.
So I started doing some research about adult ADD and the symptoms described him to a tee. The reason I started looking into adult ADD is because he was diagnosed with it as a child and was on medication for it. I believe that the condition still remains.
My concern is how do I approach him with this information? I don't want him to get hurt or insulted when I bring it up. I would also like if he'd go to a doctor to get it checked out and see his options.
TL;DR:
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I believe that my BF has Adult ADD how do I bring up that I would like him to go get it checked out without offending him.
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SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by editing the registry on a school computer
POST: Like many TIFUs, mine was not actually today. In fact, it was in 1999.
I had gotten a job doing computer tech support over the phone. Windows 98 was the newest version at the time. I figured out that you could not change the name of the Recycle Bin by simply right clicking like all the other icons. You had to go into the registry and change it. One day at school, we had a sub in physics class and I decided I would change the name of the 'Recycle Bin' on the classroom computer to 'Shit Can' This was before there was any sort of security measures on the computers at all, so I was free to do whatever. I also knew that any changes made in the registry would have a time stamp. So, I changed the time on the clock, made my edit and then changed the clock back. That way, the timestamp made it look like the edit had been done an hour earlier during a different class period. I never got in trouble for it and the next time I used that computer it had been changed back. No big deal, right?
Fast forward about a year, I'm at work, same job, on break and people are telling stories of how they hacked or messed with people using what they had learned at work. I never did much, so I just mention the 'Shit Can' story and one of my coworkers says "That was you, mother F@%#er?!?!? I got suspended for two days because of that bull$#!+" He then proceeds to tell me how he was in the physics class that was an hour before mine and he was known to be the only one in that class who worked where I did and was therefore the only one likely to know how to edit the registry. He was brought out in the hallway by the physics teacher and the computer teacher and got grilled for 10 minutes. Plus, he got in even worse trouble because he wouldn't fess up to doing it. Luckily we had graduated by then and we had become decent buddies so he got over it pretty quick.
TL;DR:
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Got another kid suspended by changing the 'Recycle Bin' to 'Shit Can' in Windows 98 on a school computer.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [20m] always feel what my GF [22F] feels and as much as its good, it's bad.
POST: we're together for 2 years and a half now.
maybe the title is confusing but what I meant is if she feels happy, I do. uncontrollably, and if she feels excited, I'll and uncontrollably do too, but the problem is she frequently feels sad and upset, and that means I'll be uncontrollably upset and sad, yesterday she felt that the whole day and I couldn't help but to be with her and feel the same the whole time ..
I don't even know why she gets sad, I spend 80% of my day with her and then she starts to change her way of talking, the way of talking that just makes you feel unwanted and unwelcomed, then she just says she's upset cuz she's bored...
and I don't care about the reasons really my feelings and heart just feel the same as her without questioning, even if I don't know the reasons.
TL;DR:
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Why do I feel the same as her? like if she's happy/sad i feel the same without knowing or questioning what's behind the feelings or anything, I just directly do...
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SUBREDDIT: r/travel
TITLE: Wanting to travel for a few months, but overwhelmed with options... Looking for some advice and suggestions please r/Travel!
POST: Ok basically I want to travel, but I'm finding myself so overwhelmed with options of where to go and if I'm honest I'm not really sure 'how' it all works. I don't know how much I'm 'supposed' to plan or anything! So I'm looking for a bit of advice, I'm being vague I know...
Some info:
I don't mind roughing it, I like seeing nature/beautiful things: mountains, rivers, waterfalls, caves, views, things like that. But I also like cities, meeting new people, drinking, partying etc.
I'll be travelling alone, I'm a young, confident and athletic guy and basically I just want to see some new countries, places that you'd never forget, meet new people, have some fun and just go out and do something adventurous and exciting... Have a good time.
I'm fairly well travelled already and I've been to Ireland, France, Germany, Portugal, Greece, Holland, Austria, USA, Canada, Russia, Kenya - but they have been with local friends or sports tours or organised trips rather than just going out there on my own and figuring out what to do. I enjoyed everything from the outdoors, to the cities, quadbiking up through mountains for the views, to going out clubbing and getting drunk. There's a pretty wide variety in the things I like, but I'm no stranger to physical activity (I love it) and I'm not worried about where I sleep as long as I've got somewhere to stay!
I have £2,000 at the moment, but I'm looking to gather around £3,000-£3,500.
What sort of places would you guys recommend? Where have you been? If you were in my position, where would you go? I'm just looking to bounce some ideas around as I'm in need of some direction...
Is it viable to just book a flight to somewhere and just see what happens and where I go?
Thanks for reading and thanks in advance for any advice!
TL;DR:
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Around £3,000-£3,500 - young, confident, athletic guy - I want to go somewhere, see places, meet people, have fun - Where would you go and for how long?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: The girl [22F] I'm [24M] seeing kissed her ex this weekend. Do I have a right to be angry?
POST: Hello people
So, for the past three months I have been seeing this girl I met at university. Things have been great and we have been spending a lot of time together.
She sleeps here often and we have tons of great sex, lots of passionate kisses and in general just a really, really good time. I'm am so much in love with her - and she tells me she is in love with me, too.
However, we are not in a relationship - or at least, we haven't had the "talk" yet. I just assumed that we were exclusive since we have been seeing each other for a while and have made it apparent that we have feelings for each other.
We don't refer to each other as boyfriend and girlfriend, but I just sort of assumed we were in the process of getting to that stage. In previous relationships I have never felt the need to "discuss" being exclusive as I just assumed that they'd feel bad if I was with someone else - so I wouldn't do it.
However, this past weekend, this girl was at a party at her dorm. Here, she met her ex boyfriend whom she broke up with eight months ago. I don't know much about it, but she has said that the relationship had been going badly for a while and that she ended up falling in love with someone else on a trip.
So she broke up with her ex and tried to pursue a relationship with this new guy, which didn't work out. Now, at this party she talked to her ex all night and ended up kissing him. Apparently, she was drunk and realized she missed him a tiny bit. She told me this today - even though she had spent the rest of the weekend at my place.
I was shocked and hurt. But do I have a right to be that way?
TL;DR:
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Been seeing this girl for three months. Not officially dating, but close to. She kisses her ex and tells me. We are not exclusive - do I have a right to be mad?
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SUBREDDIT: r/Advice
TITLE: Quitting my job soon, what will REALLY happen if I take some things I built on my way out?
POST: Let me explain. Over the last 5 years I've helped to form and improve my company's process. Additionally, I've single-handedly formed up a large number of new product offerings here, which has taken the form of quite a few Word, Excel, etc templates that document deliverable process, provide a structure for the deliverable, and make executing each deliverable a hundred times easier. I easily go twice as quick in my work because I have laid such a solid foundation here for each of these deliverables. Not only am I faster, but these templates also act as checklists of sorts to make sure I'm covering everything I need to cover when executing a deliverable.
Here's my question: do I truly need to leave all of this groundwork behind when I move onto my next job? I obviously have a lot of the knowledge stored in my brain - but I would inevitably spend hundreds of hours recreating these templates at my new job. Can I just take these templates from my current work and repurpose them in my new job? I understand there are intellectual property laws surrounding this kind of thing, but do people actually adhere to those? Do companies actually enforce them?
TL;DR:
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I made a bunch of templates at my job that make me twice as fast at my work. Can I take those to my next job?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I rejected someone and I know he still wants to be with me. Is it cruel to keep him as a friend even if I have no intention of ever dating him?
POST: So a little background. We're both in high school, and I started talking to him in hallways and eating lunch with his friends, with no relation before this. I'm someone who's naturally nice to everyone and when I started talking to him, never flirting unless you count being pleasant. I was just looking for another friend. (I'm happily in a relationship and have been for over a year) He asked me out and I politely declined, and tried to remain friends, but I can tell he's setting so that if (when?) my bf and I break up, he can step in to fill his place. He always tries to "flirt without flirting" (always sitting right next to me even if there's open seats, asking me to go on "platonic" dates and the like) and it makes me really uncomfortable. I don't want to reject him again without him actually asking again, but I also have no intention of ever dating and don't want him to have that hope. Is it okay for me to keep trying to be his friend even though I know he wants more?
TL;DR:
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I friend zoned someone. Can I still be his friend even though he still has hope of a relationship? Can it still be a good friendship?
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SUBREDDIT: r/Advice
TITLE: [19/f] Want to drive long distance to see my boyfriend, parents would never accept it
POST: I'm a 19 year old female in college living in a dorm, and my boyfriend lives in an apartment 300 miles away. I really want to go visit him over the weekend, but my parents wouldn't ever let me, because they don't think I'm a good enough driver. I'm considering going without telling them, should I do it?
I'm a safe driver, I've never been in a wreck before, and I have interstate experience. I have driven long distance before, too (with my parents in the car) and I did fine. I am a little nervous to go alone, though. I'm not sure what I'd do if I got in a wreck or got a flat tire or something. I'm not worried about getting lost, because my car has a GPS built in.
I almost made the trip already with my boyfriend's older sister driving, but I asked my parents first, and they wouldn't even let me do that. It makes me really pissed because my sister drove 600 miles with friends when she was my age, and she had been in two wrecks before that were her fault. Since I'm the youngest child, they tend to treat me like a baby.
If I go up there on the weekend without telling my parents, they wouldn't know because they don't see me on weekends. I'd also pay for the trip with my own money, I'd just have to use cash and not my debit card because they have access to my checking account. The only way I can think of them finding out is if they checked the mileage on my car.
TL;DR:
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I'm a college student and I want to visit my long distance boyfriend on the weekend, but my parents wouldn't be okay with it. If I go without telling them, they wouldn't know. Should I do it?
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SUBREDDIT: r/dating_advice
TITLE: Said she wants to wait so we can become better friends...
POST: **All original information located here:**
So I went along with the advice in the original post (And I'm really glad I did) and here is what happened:
We organised to meet after school and talk about it, and we walked for about 5-10 minutes, she was thinking, smiling a lot and constantly saying sorry, then said something along the lines of "Your the first person to ask me out, stay friends and get to know each-other more to not make it awkward, ect". Then we talked about holidays (Since we are now on an 8-week holiday period)
Fast forward to yesterday, where I organised to go with her to the movies, but didn't say it directly and implied it, more or less.
What I'm trying to ask here is what should I do? Because of the really long break of not seeing and talking to each other in and around school where it felt more comfortable (we communicate a lot at the moment, but it has only been two days since we saw each other) I fear that something may happen, but I don't want to just jump in an ask again too soon, as it will probably spoil what is already here. I also would like to know how to become her 'friend' more over the long break.
Is there something I can say or do to ask her if she is ready?
Is there a sign that she will show?
Am I overthinking this?
TL;DR:
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Not sure when to ask girl I like out *again* because she said she wanted to get to know me more, but not sure how to do it. Also how to know when she is ready
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Is there hope for my husband and I [22/m and 22/f] after an awful first year together?
POST: We got married in Dec 2014, and the first year was... Awful. My husband has a personality disorder that went undiagnosed and I have anxiety disorder.
We were constantly fighting, and I mean, every day. He would yell at me and sometimes he'd hit me in his anger. I was really anxious and got on his nerves a lot because I was needy. I got upset over little things like him not contributing to the household and saying negative things about things I made or liked.
About 6 months ago, he started on medication and he became more calm. He didn't hit me anymore but I'd still make problems and we'd argue, but less.
Then about 4 months ago I started taking Zoloft and going to therapy. We also go to couples counseling. The arguing has just... Stopped. He apologized and cried because of how he sometimes treated me (which he didn't use to do) and I became less anxious. He also goes to anger management and has cut contact with his terrible relatives.
Everything has been going so well lately. He's still very depressed but he confides in me now and doesn't take it out on me. We talk a lot, go on dates and find comfort in each other. I feel now finally that this is what I wanted from married life.
In the back of my mind though, I worry. I've never heard of anyone who had a good relationship after an awful start like ours. I never hear about people who stayed with someone who used to be violent and made it work.
I don't feel any resentment towards him. I love him a lot and he loves me. But do we have a chance? Is there anyone here who recovered from something similar?
TL;DR:
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husband and I had a terrible first year together. We got help and now we're happy. Is it possible that we can build a future together?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: [22M] I'm afraid my lack of willpower will start to negatively affect my relationships
POST: So for a while now I've had a serious lack of willpower when it comes to doing what's good for me. At first it was just being too lazy to work out and eat healthy, and sometimes be lax about school, but recently it's become a REALLY bad problem. I'm eating out way too much, spending too much money on food and not eating healthily, I'm really behind on schoolwork because I get distracted easily. I'm afraid this lack of willpower may start seeping in and start ruining friendships and relationships (if it hasn't already).
How do I go about changing this? Is it just as simple as telling myself to get it together and start being an adult?
TL;DR:
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don't have willpower when it comes to things like spending money or being responsible, how do I change this or do I just have to start being an adult?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My (24m) co-worker (29f) is being physically and verbally abused and I'm thinking of calling social services
POST: I've been working with a girl for 6 months now, and she has alluded through jokes and conversation that she is physically and verbally abused by her s/o. She has had multiple random emotional outbursts, where she cries and says things along the lines of she doesn't deserve it, mind you randomly, and she never goes into too much detail. One time she talked about how she and her s/o got into a fight and showed bruises but acted jokingly about it.
I'm thinking about calling social services, I don't know if that's the right route, or what I should do, or how to be anonymous, but I'm afraid it's escalating for her. She usually calls her boyfriend at work and after being told she couldn't today she had an anxiety attack and had to leave. It was like the fact she couldn't truly terrified her. She's been calling off more often and to avoid wall of text they seem to be due to things related to him though I'm more speculating.
I appreciate any help or guidance I can get, just worried for her, and she has children, 3, so especially for them. I appreciate any advice or guidance I can get.
TL;DR:
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almost positive that a co worker is in an physically/emotionally abusive relationship, looking for advice on if I should report it and how to do so(at work response will take a while)
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SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: F(21)Had drunk hookup with best guy friend M(23). What now?
POST: So I had to make a throwaway account because my friend knows my other reddit username. Me and this guy have been best friends for about 4 years, we met at university we were both single at the time but there was no attraction there on my part. Flash forward to the incident. We were hanging out at my place just having some beers watching a movie. He kept getting me beer after beer and I being comfortable/drunk kept accepting them. He wasn't drinking as much as me. I ended up blacking out, waking up alone at my place figuring he just left. Two weeks later he revealed to me that we had hooked up (apparently everything but intercourse).I don't remember it at all. This guy has a girlfriend that he's been with since he was 21 and they live together. I can't believe this has happened I'm so mortified. I've never thought about this guy in that way EVER and never blacked out from drinking before. I don't know what to do at all, he said he wants to break up with his girlfriend to be with me because he told me his felt this way for a long time but I don't have feelings like that towards him. I don't even remember it.Obviously I feel like a complete idiot for what happened, I don't know how to deal with this. On the one hand I feel like the trust is completely broken how long has he been hiding his true feelings. On the other, I'm disgusted with myself for doing that with someone who obviously I care about as a friend but is in a relationship and I am not sexually attracted to. In addition, ever since I found out Ive felt lost, wondering how it got this way. Clearly I'm struggling with how to deal with what happened, so reddit help me if you can.
TL;DR:
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when I was blackout drunk hooked up with guy friend who was tipsy he is in a relationship. He wants to be with me I have no attraction to him. Am now disgusted with myself.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My[30M] live-in girlfriend[32F] does not come to bed. I have no idea why.
POST: I've been dating my girlfriend for six years now. Three months ago, we finally took the big step of moving in together. We got the house set up with a bedroom for us, with the understanding we would be sharing a bed. Despite this setup, she most often sleeps on the couch.
I've asked her why, and she usually will tell me she's sorry and I should wake her up when I'm ready for bed since I saty up a few hours later than she does. This would be fine, except she doesn't respond well to being woken up. If I'm gentle about it, it doesn't work and she stays sleeping. On the other hand, if I were to be firm she gets extremely upset at me and the end result is a two hour fight. I've also tried dodging the issue entirely and suggesting she go to bed when I first notice her starting to close her eyes. She calls that acting like her father and doesn't appreciate it.
I am simply out of ideas. I don't want to leave her on the couch all night every night, but I also don't want to argue with her every night either. Should I simply take the couch before she has a chance, or is there another path I failed to think of?
TL;DR:
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Girlfriend sleeps on the couch every night despite professing to not want to, responds negatively when woken for bed.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [17/M] cheated on my girlfriend [18/F].
POST: I have been dating my girlfriend for just under one year and one month. I absolutely love her to death and I truly believe that she is my soulmate. I know she feels the same way about me.
We're both in grade 12, and this week she went to Cuba for her grad trip. I miss her so much. I've never felt this way about any girl before.
Today, a friend of mine [16/F] who I've known for a while asked to hangout. My girlfriend and I both know that she used to have a crush on me and my girlfriend didn't like her, but feeling lonely I accepted. We went for a walk for a while but it was cold outside, so we went back to the condo I live in. We have a sauna in the condo, so we decided to go there. It was a small, enclosed area, which just the two of us.
Initially, we sat at other sides of the room but slowly she got closer and closer until she was sitting right beside me. We were playing truth or dare and initially, it was very very g-rated questions, like "what have you done that you regretted" and what not. It was innocent enough. Finally, she dared me to kiss her and I looked at her. I DID NOT want to kiss her. I looked at her in shock and she kissed me. I immediately pulled away and the kiss lasted less than half a second. I told her it was time to go home and we both parted ways.
I feel so incredibly bad. I've never cheated on my girlfriend. I honestly am in love with her. I would do anything to make her smile but I really messed up. She is my best friend. I am going to tell her when she gets back from her trip.
I feel worse for being in that situation rather than her kissing me, but that being said, I feel terrible.
I feel like I failed her and I feel like complete crap right now. What do I do? I want to tell her everything that happened because I don't hide anything from her but I just need some help. Please.
TL;DR:
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girl kissed me in sauna room while my girlfriend was gone on a trip. I quickly pulled away and kicked her out but I feel terrible.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [18 M] with my ex [17F] of 2 years, get back together
POST: Me and my ex got together about 2,5 years ago, we were really close, but towards the end of the relationship I started losing interest.
One week before she broke up with me after telling me several times to please give her more attention, she cheated on me with a guy she met online (sent nudes, counts as cheating).
I did not know about this, for a very long time. We talked very rarely for about a year or so, and I never even thought about her, until she went on a trip to London about 2 months ago. I was worried she would find someone (childish, I know) so started texting her a lot. I became very clingy to her and told her I wanted her back, and brought her a (very late) birthday gift for her birthday about 10 months ago. She told me no, but I kept trying, until she finally became super attached like she was in the beginning, texting me all the time and making out with me etc.
This is when I found out she cheated on me at the end of our relationship, and I started asking her a lot of weird questions about it (how often she sent him nudes, if they went on Skype to do that kind of stuff, if they sexted etc. etc., I don't know why but I obsessively need to know the answer to those types of detailed questions).
This annoyed her, and she became less affectionate, also because I asked her more questions about another guy she had been with in that period, and had made out with. She gets very annoyed when I ask this kind of stuff. She says she only wants me as a friend, but every time we meet we make out.
So right now, she is saying its better if we are just friends, and later she will come back to me, because she wants to marry me (??), but right now she doesn't want me.
I told her that thats not realistic, and that I wouldn't want to marry her if she had been with a bunch of other guys in the time I was waiting.
TL;DR:
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Ex who I had a very very close and deep relationship with, but didn't appreciate, broke up with me. I want her back, but my questions and/or clinginess ruined her interest. What should I do?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [27M] with depression with my friend [25F], she told me she was interested in something and I said I was too... but something went wrong
POST: I felt *nothing*. I said the words, saying that I felt the same way, but I felt *nothing." Just a hole in my gut where things were supposed to be. Not disagreement, not reciprocation... It was so disturbing, I closed my computer and just lay there for an hour, staring at the wall. I just kind of shut down.
I haven't talked to her in a couple days because I don't know how to tell her that I think it's a very bad idea. I am *really* fucked up inside. I'm getting therapy, but I was more disturbed by this than anything I've ever experienced.
She is my friend. I do like her. But this lack of emotion is... even for me, *wrong*.
TL;DR:
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Suffering from depression, friend was interested in me, I said the same, but I felt absolutely no emotion and shut down. Don't know how to move forward.
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SUBREDDIT: r/dogs
TITLE: [Help] My 2 yr old dog's anxiety has suddenly increased
POST: Our 2 year old male papillon poodle mix has always been slightly anxious and was super whiny when we first got him, but seemed to settle down as he got older. Over the last month, and even just in the last couple of days, his anxiety has gotten much worse. We moved at the beginning of May and he made the transition very well. He didn't have any accidents, no whining, and seemed very happy for the bigger backyard. However, at the end of June we had new neighbors move next door. They have two younger boys who enjoy lighting off fireworks just about every day at random times. Our dog handled it ok the first time it happened, but the more often it happened, the worse he got.
Now it seems any slightly loud noise, including his sister's barking, will start him shaking, breathing quickly, panting, and being clingy. His anxiety over being alone has also gotten a lot worse over just the last few days. I work nights so our dogs are used to having free roam of the yard and house during the day and really couldn't care less about where I am, but today when I got up he about jumped over the gate to get to me and now won't leave my side for anything.
I'm just not sure what to do for him. I try to comfort him, but that doesn't seem to help much. I've looked into thundershirts but I don't want to make him wear it all the time and I never know when I kids next door are going to set something loud off. I'm almost to the point of taking him to the vet to get checked out and maybe medication because it makes me so sad seeing him upset so often. Any ideas on how to help him would be great!
TL;DR:
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2 yr old dog with big increase of anxiety over the last month with any loud noises. Looking for ideas on how to help him
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SUBREDDIT: r/personalfinance
TITLE: [CA] Advice regarding auto insurance payout
POST: I own a 2007 Honda Civic (70k miles) with which I got into a "lane change" accident back in December 2015. It resulted in minor cosmetic damage to both vehicles, my headlight cover and front bumper are cracked with a small chunk also missing from my front bumper. My insurance ruled the other party was 100% at fault and his insurance ruled I was 100% at fault. Basically it boils down to my word vs. his. I've exhausted every possibility I can think of to try to disprove what he has told his insurance company (such as calling local businesses to see if they had a camera covering the street where the accident occurred). I have full collision coverage with a $500 deductible. My insurance sent a field adjuster to assess the damage to my vehicle and priced it out at $1500.
I've considered small claims court, but would the ruling differ at all from what our insurance companies have already determined? I have no way to prove he's lying, so it doesn't seem worth the time investment.
TL;DR:
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Do I take the money ($1000 after subtracting my deductible) and just live with the cosmetic damage or do I pay $500 to get my vehicle repaired?
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SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Some of my friends are constantly bitching about how hard their lives are. Can redditors who have actually struggled put their stories here to show them how far removed from reality they are?
POST: To give you some background these guys ALL go to university. I live I a country where college is relatively cheap. If you can't afford to pay the fees are waived. Not only this but you will receive a grant up to the value of about 3000 euro if you qualify. None of them work (not because they can't but because they don't have to). In perspective I have worked since the day I walked into to college because despite the grants and waived fees my parents can't support me. I now am currently working two jobs writing essays and preparing for exams in a couple of weeks and I think I have one of the most gifted lives around. (I know it sounds like I'm moaning but I'm not)
Some of these people are on there second degrees in the same discipline. Others have parents who have six figure incomes and many of them think it is there RIGHT to have their education paid for AND receive the grant even though they plan on immigrating after college.
one recieves about two hundred a week in benefits while in college and says he isn't getting enough and it's a disgrace.
TL;DR:
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a combination of over privileged kids and people who get paid to go to college think their lives are hard can you tell them different please?
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SUBREDDIT: r/personalfinance
TITLE: Guaranteed Promotion or Possible Future Career Path?
POST: I have a bit of a situation that I think PF would give solid advice on.
I am currently a Admin Coordinator for a major company in the US. My boss has offered me a promotion to Contract Administrator with a 49% raise. Around the same time her boss posted a Project Analyst position which would also be a promotion with a similar ( if not more) pay raise. I am qualified for both positions (over qualified for the administrator position honestly but it's the next step from what I currently do).
The wrench in the plans is that my boss is looking to make a decision this week and her boss hasn't even scheduled her official interviews yet (she even admitted that she should have been more on top of it but had other pressing deadlines).
My boss is aware that I applied for this position and I know they spoke about me in the PA role. I've been in my current position for a little over a year and am ready to progress.
This is my first post so let me know if I'm forgetting anything.
TL;DR:
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My boss offered me a position she wants to fill this week, while I'm also in consideration for a position with her boss.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My(26f) bf's(32m) dad(50ish m) took an invite to thanksgiving dinner as an insult
POST: So my bf and his dad are close. But my bf and his sister hate each other. Normally on thanksgiving the kids (my bf and his sister) go to their dad's. But this is the first year me and my bf have our own place together and are inviting at least my family (my mom and step dad) over. So this afternoon while we were visiting his dad I asked if he had any plans for thanksgiving. He said not anything yet. So I replied "well you are more than welcome to come over to our house". He just smiled and said ok. Now I get a fb msg from him that said my invite was insulting because his kids always come to his house. And that my invite was a way of me saying that the only way he could see his son was to come to our house with people he doesn't know.
When I got the msg I was cuddled up so my bf saw the msg. And then started chewing his dad out via text. Now they are arguing and my bf is thinking about cutting ties with his dad over it. Im devastated. I love my bf but dont wanna be the cause of him losing the only parent that cares for him, and the only member of his family that regularly talks to him...
I dont know what to do. I cant stop crying right now which is making my bf even more mad. And I dont know How to reply to his dad.
TL;DR:
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my bfs dad took my invite to thanksgiving dinner as an insult. now my bf is thinking about cutting ties with his dad (the only family hes close with)
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [22M] found out the girl [20F] I boinked yesterday is a stripper. Still take her to dinner?
POST: I [22M] met a girl[20F] a few months back through a mutual friend. We hung out a few times, and had sex several times. Absolute freak in the sheets. She was a sweet girl that worked a retail job (verified at the time). Things fizzled quickly and that was that.
Last night rolls around and I was invited to a Labor Day BBQ at our mutual friend's house. I hadn't seen her since the last time we had sex months ago. We get to talking again, and we are left alone for a few minutes. Boom. We have sex again in our friends living room. Clothes go back on, and the friends come back and all is like nothing happened.
One conversation leads to another, and I come to find out she is a stripper. We had already discussed going out to dinner later in the week, but now I'm having second thoughts.
Do I still take her out or judge her for being a stripper and call it off?
TL;DR:
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A girl [22F] was a cashier at a store last time I had sex with her. This time she's a stripper, and I didn't know. Do I go out on a date with her this week?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [21M] with my GF [19F] of 4 months, going to be apart for most of the next 3. How to handle this well?
POST: We started dating in mid-January and have had a pretty great 4 months overall. There were a couple rocky patches, but we worked things out and seemed to come out of them better and more committed. She just headed home for the summer yesterday.
We'll be in separate cities for the whole summer, her taking classes and me interning and training for my sport. Due to my sports commitments I don't know my schedule fully yet and will have trouble getting time to visit her (my presence is essential at all times from the start of June to the start of August for the others on my team to practice). She's working out a weekend to visit me so we'll get to see each other at least once before we go back to school.
I was hoping to get advice from others who have been in this situation in relatively young relationships, just on how to best stay in touch and keep the spark when we're hundreds of miles apart. I want to talk to her and keep up with her but also don't want to be overbearing to let her have her space and have fun for the summer. I don't want to damper her enjoyment of the summer in any way.
Additionally, we have a very active sex life and I know it'll be hard on her in particular to go from spending 3-5 nights per week together to nothing for months. Talking dirty on the phone/Skype has definitely crossed my mind but it just seems so awkward in my head, I don't know if/how I could genuinely go through with it.
Thanks for reading and for any advice!
TL;DR:
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First time apart for a significant amount of time, how do we best stay in touch and keep the spark over the summer?
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SUBREDDIT: r/personalfinance
TITLE: (US) Is personal gift money considered eligible income for a Roth IRA contribution?
POST: Hello,
I recently opened a Roth IRA and contributed a relatively small amount towards the 2013 tax contribution limit. However, I just started a part-time job today (I'm currently a college student) and did not have any formal income last year other than cash gifts that well exceed the contribution I made. The cash itself is in a checking account that is co-signed by a parent. I assumed this would make me eligible to contribute for 2013 as the total contribution must not exceed the income for the year in question, but after reading some articles online I am not so sure.
FWIW I file taxes as a dependent. What would you advise I do to handle this situation?
TL;DR:
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Made a Roth IRA contribution for 2013 when my only income was gift money from friends and distant relatives, not sure if my contribution would exceed my reportable income depending on whether gift money is reportable.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [20 F] ruining relationship with [25M] because of poor self image and hang ups
POST: It brings my SO down as well. I feel like it's putting a strain on my relationship with him and pushing him away.
There is a 2 month waiting list at my university for therapy, and I've been through the cycle last year and it was unimpressive. I would love to go to a private practitioner but the ones that I have found that I feel compatible with have an avg session rate of $130-300 dollars. I live in a small college town so we don't even have too many.
I don't know what I can do about this. I don't want to ask my SO for it even though I know he would probably pay for it if I asked politely. I budget off of $400/month. I'm not sure what expenses I could cut to afford therapy. My parents are out of the question. They become emotionally and verbally abusive whenever I open my mouth and something other than "I'm happy to be studying!" doesn't come out.
I'm really confused as to what I should do. I've already taken a step and cut out a lot of triggers in my life that specifically made me feel bad. Been on the internet and tumblr a lot less. I started a diet in January but I am thinking of dropping it because I am at a health weight and restricting my caloric intake really stresses me out because I already maintain a fairly low one. What else can I do to take steps towards feeling better and more confident with myself???
I've stopped talking to my SO about it. I want more than ever to compliment fish and ask for stuff like that, but I restrain myself from doing so. It's not like I've ever done so in the past, but I've just stopped mentioning my rotten mood all together. It's making me resent him at times. I don't even want to have sex with him because what's the point? I don't even look remotely similar to the girls in porn.
TL;DR:
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Poor self image, poor body image, can't afford therapy right now, trying to fix me. It's ruining my relationship, pushing me and my SO further apart.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: How do I tell my friends that I don't enjoy spending time with them anymore?
POST: There's this group of friends(24m, 27f, 28f, 24f)
that I (24m) have, and we all met at the publishing company I used to work for. Every Thursday night we get together and watch a tv show. I don't dislike them as people, but just genuinely don't care to keep a weekly commitment to spending time together any longer, nor,frankly, would I miss their company if I never saw or spoke to them again.
My dilemma is, I don't know how to make this clear (just the part about not wanting to hang out) without coming off as a jerk. Is there a way? Any thoughts are appreciated.
TL;DR:
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I'm bored with my group of friends and want out of our weekly hangouts. How do I handle this without sounding mean?
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SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Women of reddit, when you say to a guy that is close to you and you feel comfortable with to not swear, do you really mean it or is it some shit that you say but you don't really mean, just like many other things that women say?
POST: It's perfectly fine by me if a girl tells me that she's offended by my generous use of words such as cunt and fuck in my daily conversation, however if it comes from someone close and with a tone that it seems to me that she's just trying to be the good girl mommy told her to be and laughs loudly at sentences that start with "fuck" and end with "fucking cunt", should I really worry?
P.S. I'm Iranian and I don't speak perfect English and I greatly appreciate being corrected on grammar, but please for heaven's sake don't be a fucking grammar nazi cunt.
TL;DR:
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Does "don't swear" fall in the same category as "I like to be treated like a princess" when it's said by a woman. That's to say it's said but it's not meant.
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SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: There are some guys at my school who support slavery because it 'got shit done', how do I effectively tell them they're fucking assholes?
POST: The topic has come up a few times, and every time it does they talk about how slavery was a fantastic institution because it was so productive. Now, they're right in the fact that it was profitable, but they also don't think it's morally wrong. I'd want to tell them that they're being stupid, but I can't do that without bringing up morals or values, and any points made about morals can be disputed really easily since you can just say stuff like, "well I don't think that." Here's how the conversation went basically:
*Asshole: slavery was awesome, it got shit done!*
*Me: that's fucked up.*
*Asshole: give me one reason why slavery was bad.*
*Me: well, we were enslaving people, so that's probably not an awesome thing to do.*
*Asshole: (this is verbatim what he said) they weren't actually slaves though, we bought them. We owned them.*
*Me: that's literally the definition of slavery. Owning a person is slavery.*
*Asshole: does that mean my dogs are slaves? I bought them.*
*Me: I guess so. But a dog isn't a human being.*
*Asshole: haha, you still haven't answered my question.*
After that I don't even know what the fuck to say. I know I should probably just ignore these people because they're fucking stupid, but I really want to prove them wrong before I do. How do I logically tell them they're wrong for supporting slavery without bringing up morals and values?
TL;DR:
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there are some people at my school who think slavery is great. How do I tell them they're assholes with concrete facts?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: How can I [19F] stop crying so easily?
POST: I was always a crybaby. In fact, when I was younger it was kind of my nickname. In middle school I kinda grew a little tougher, but I noticed that even now I still got a long ways to go.
For example, when talking about some issues I´m facing with certain people I can´t help it but my eyes start watering. And what is worse is that it can affect my proffesional life too. This summer I worked for a month and had some very small disagreements with one of my colleagues which happened because of my lack of experience. When she brought the problem to my attention my eyes started watering and I got all choked up.
Please halp.
TL;DR:
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Basically I´m a crybaby who wants to finally grow past this stage and would appreciate any input on how to change that fact
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [24 M] with my 2 roommates [24 F], I recently went through a breakup and they are still hanging out with my ex
POST: My ex (25F) of 2 1/2 years broke up recently and I've been having a hard time with it. Even more difficult is that my two roommates whom I introduced to her are still really good friends with her. One of them in particular still talks with her regularly and despite them saying they don't talk about me I don't really believe it (she always knows when i've been with my ex, she slips up and lets out little details that I had told my ex and no one else). Then the other day they were invited to a dinner party at my exes house that i obviously was not invited to. They knew I was upset about it but still went anyway leaving me home alone by myself, which personally I just thought was a shitty thing to do to a friend. I'm really struggling with them remaining such close friends with her while I'm trying to move on. I feel like they are providing my ex with this one-sided mirror view into my life that I don't have with her and I feel like I can't be myself in my own home. I've brought it up that it makes me uncomfortable and they tend to get really defensive. I even got into a yelling match with one of them the other night because she convinced me to go hang out at a bar with our friends and just didn't tell me all my exes friends were going to be there too. Obviously I had a shitty night and left and when I told her how mad I was about it she came home screaming at me. Obviously it's putting a huge strain on our friendship and my living situation. I don't want to tell them not to be friends with her anymore because it just seems like a shitty thing to do, to tell people they can't be friends with someone, but it is making me really uncomfortable in my own home. Any advice?
TL;DR:
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my roommates are still close friends with my ex and it's putting a strain on our friendship/living arraingment
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My [17M] girlfriend of a year and a half [17F] tells people that are interested in having sex with her about OUR sex life.
POST: Hi there, I have a feeling this post will be filled with grammatical mistakes and I'm sorry in advance.
Today I figured out my girlfriend's instagram password, the reason for me even trying to figure it out was because we've had a past experience of her getting a little to close with another guy on insta.
The first thing I saw when I looked in her dm's was some messages from a guy she told me not to worry about. It was about the last time we had sex, I couldn't see any previous conversations or how this conversation had started because she deletes her messages because she's afraid her mom will go through her phone.
The conversation started with her saying 'this tuesday' and he asked what positions and she replied with the positions we'd done, he asked her how many times she orgasm'd and she told him how many. The guy then said I could do better and she said "No you couldn't" and then he sent the final message which was 'alg ur life'.
I don't know what to make of this, I don't know why she's comfortable telling random people that want to have sex with her about OUR sex and it seems like a huge break of trust. I don't know if I should confront her about it now or sit on it for a while and see if they talk more. I have snooped on her phone before and found stuff similar to this and she changed all her pw's, so confrontation with her would be ugly.
I really really love this girl and the last thing I want to do is break up with her.
TL;DR:
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girlfriend talks to guys on insta that are looking to hookup with her about our sex life. I don't know what to do about it.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: FWB of 4 months wanted to be my gf, after a month of trying to be more serious she wants to go back to be casual, what should I do?
POST: I've been having sex with this girl I met since December. We did this arrangement for about 2-3 months before she wanted us to be exclusive. We started going on dates and acting like a couple but we werent together until we had the define the relationship talk.
We tried being more serious for a month but it didn't work out because we couldn't see each other enough and she said that she felt like nothing changed since before when we weren't in a relationship.
The problem is she's an au pair student and she'll go back to Brazil next year and I'm leaving for the navy this summer. And she said there's no reason to stay in a relationship that's gonna end at some point. I agree with this and she said it's better for us to go back before and be more causual and see each other when we can. It's weird because a week before she said this we were an official couple but then a week later she wants to go back being fwb. Im pretty sure she didn't find anyone else in a period of a week so I feel like she just wants to fuck and not be serious because she knows a relationship won't work out because of the circumstances.
If I wasn't leaving then maybe it could work but I kinda don't want a gf either, I still like her though and I still want to keep spending time that I do have here with her before I leave. She said she feels the same and still wants to see me. What should I do?
TL;DR:
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my fwb of 4 months wanted to be my gf, we tried for a month but nothing changed and it didn't workout, now she wants to go back to being causal before we dated. What should i do?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: How/when should I [23F] bring up DTR talk when apart?
POST: Met an amazing guy [26M] online back in Dec. He's originally from an area near my hometown and was back on break from medical school (out of state). We had two 5-hour long dates before he went back to school. He's a first year. I'm going to grad school this fall (3 year program). When he left, we chatted almost every single day since then via text and snapchat. We have great conversation and I'm extremely attracted to him.
I was in a town near where he goes to school to check out grad schools and we decided to meet up. He proposed that we go out for drinks so he told me he would book a room so he wouldn't have to drive back that night. Ended up spending more than 24 hours together, including sex. The day he drove back, he held my hand and kissed me sporadically throughout the day. It was such a pleasant time. He had previously hinted to me that he could do clinical rotations basically anywhere after his second year and that he would love to live in any big city. I don't mind where I live either.
We're at a point where we both like each other but no one wants to bring up what's going to happen. I'm confused about what his schedule will be like for the rest of his schooling. I am set on going to a grad school in our home state, but we graduate the same year. At that point, we can move anywhere.
How do I bring up our future/his plans v. my plans? I've suggested we have a skype date but we haven't done it yet. I know he's super busy. But at the same time, I feel like this is a conversation we need to have in person, but he won't be back until early/mid June. I don't know if I can hold out that long for a possible relationship. It's killing me how much I miss him but I also don't want to feel this way or waste my free time this spring and summer if it won't work out long term.
TL;DR:
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How do I bring up a Defining The Relationship talk with someone out of state in med school? Should this talk be in person or via skype?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: [M/23] Relationship anxiety/How do I perceive love and overcome fear in a romantic relationship?
POST: I feel as though I've consistently had anxiety issues when I enter into romantic relationships. I think that as a more analytically inclined person, it stresses me out that I can sometimes have trouble perceiving or quantifying the idea of being in love with another person. This seems to inevitably result in self-doubt and can cause me to question whether or not I am actually in love with the person whom I am in a relationship with.
At this point, I've generally learned to just ignore these feelings, let them slide, and gain confidence in myself and my partnerships over time. However, I have just entered into an incredibly serious relationship with a girl who is considering making some significant changes to her life plan to be with me. To be clear, **I love the shit out of this girl**. However, the changes she is considering making for me leave me terrified of hurting her/falling out of love with her, and I feel like this fear is seriously harming my ability to connect with her and understand/convey my feelings.
TL;DR:
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I'm so afraid of falling out of love and hurting the love of my life that I have trouble actually feeling love.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [19M] and my friend [19F] (seriously, just a FRIEND) live far away from each other. The relationship is really one sided with me doing the work...
POST: **I really hope i get more than a few replies.**
I really am stuck in a pickle with this and i dont want to lose my friend. But then again....
My friend and I live in totally different places and we talk. We talk a lot, we talk a little, we don't talk at all.
This is what happens: I have to text her first all the time and it annoys me because I feel like I'm the only one to try in our relationship. For some reason, whenever we text now (it didn't used to be like this!!) it is always me trying so hard for conversations.
We used to talk everyday and I miss her. But now it has turned into a maybe once-a-month thing. Sometimes it isn't even that.
This is how all of our conversations start after not talking for a while: "I miss you!!" "I miss you too" blahblahblah! Then the next day or two she barely replies and it makes me so mad/sad.
I want to tell her "you know it is not a one person relationship. It's a two way street and you finally texted me first and now won't even talk a few days later!!" miss me my ass...
I don't know what to do and it has been two days since we talked. I think she expects me to do everything but I am done. At least I feel that way. Then when she texts me my heart drops because I love seeing her name on my phone...
Then it all goes downhill from there...what do I do?
TL;DR:
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friend and I don't talk much but when we do I want to talk to her for days straight. But then it ends up that I have to do everything and she doesn't keep the conversation going..what do I do?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: 18m been at university for two months and my "girlfriend", 16, seems to have lost interest
POST: So we met about two years ago in high school I was a junior and she was a freshman. Asked her for her number and we started texting but we rarely hung out because I was super busy with sports and the college hunt and we had different groups of friends. That went on for about a year. So during winter of my senior year (her sophomore year) our groups of friends merged a little bit and we began hanging out more. We became more romantically involved and started to go on dates/hang out alone. We essentially became exclusive. Here's the kicker; we've never kissed. I didn't want to "ask her out" or make it official without at least having kissed the girl before. She's never had a boyfriend so she doesn't really know how to act in a relationship. So over summer we spent a ton of time together but still never kissed. We cuddled watching movies, held hands on walks, but never kissed. We've talked about how we feel about each other and definitely still have interest in a relationship but that's as far as the conversation goes.
Two months ago I left for university six hours away from home and she's still back at home. For the first month we facetimed/skyped a couple times a week and texted daily. However, this month she always makes excuses for not wanting to facetime or talk on the phone and never will text me first. She's told me about guys in her school who have interest in her and gets mad when I tell her I don't want to know about the guys who like her. We're drifting apart and it annoys me because I can usually solve problems like this but I really don't know what to do. She's not romantic at all so anything lovey dovey isn't going to happen. I've told her I'm annoyed with the situation and she's very standoffish. She says she "still likes me and wants to be together but hates the situation we're in". I won't be home until thanksgiving and really just want to make it work until then so we can actually talk about it in person. Any suggestions or help is welcome and thanks in advance.
TL;DR:
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Weird start to relationship. Finally became "exclusive". Haven't kissed. Now I'm six hours away and we're drifting apart because she seems to have lost interest.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: I [26m] don't know how to be appropriately supportive of my wife [26f] and it makes her feel like I'm not on her team sometimes.
POST: My wife tells me sometimes that she feels like I'm not supportive of her, and that she doesn't feel like I do enough to make her feel safe and loved. I've asked her what that looks like for her and to give example of ways that I've been unsupportive, and ways that I could potentially be supportive, but she side-steps the question. I'm not sure if that's because she doesn't know, or if she thinks I'm stupid and should figure it out on my own. Either way, I'm trying very hard to figure out what she needs from me, and I could really use some advice in that area. I love her to pieces and she means the world to me, so it's not that I'm not feeling it, I'm just not expressing it to her satisfaction, and I'd like to fix that.
I thought about what I might like from a partner if I was in need of support and I wanted to feel safe and loved, but it doesn't seem like any of the things that would help me are applicable to her. Where should I start? My first instinct was to think supportive = financially supportive, but that's something she's been very clear about NOT wanting or needing. We make comparable salaries and share expenses, and she has been adamant that that's exactly how she wants things to be. She dislikes it when I spend money "frivolously" on gifts and things for her, and she doesn't want me to be the sole breadwinner.
For context, we are both very busy. We both work full time, we have a kid and two dogs, and she is also in school part time. So I know she feels stretched very thin a lot of the time.
TL;DR:
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What does "supportive" look like and how do I do it? General suggestions would be great, but specific would be even better if possible.
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SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: has anyone met someone who concretely confirmed every social stereotype you've ever heard about that group.
POST: I work in a restaurant in a small town in southwest Virginia so its a pretty conservative homogenous culture last night i was put in charge of training 3 new staff members one of them was gay this is like i said uncommon and as such i had not had much experience interacting with gays. in the first five minutes i spoke to him and listened to him speak to the rest of the new employees he had fufilled every single gay stereotype i had ever heard of. he said holla called one of the women honey and gurlfriend in the same sentence suggested that the uniforms be change to an obscure color to prevent clashing talked about obscure broadway shows and shoes when one of the women mentioned patrick swayze he said "honey i would ride that cute ass of his all night long if you give me your email address ill sent you a nude picture of him" after that i had to excuse my self to 'talk to the manager' so i could go the bus station to laugh my ass off and not offend him. i had brushed off all these stereotypes a bigoted as most stereotypes are so it caught me off guard
TL;DR:
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new guy at work is gay he used every gay stereotype i ever heard of. (i do not mean any offense to gays so dont take it that way i just thought it was extremely funny)
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Should I [24M] ask her [29F] if we should be an official couple?
POST: Little back story. I'm working at a dead-end job at the moment and looking for a more career oriented job. She is already at a very well established job and is doing considerably better than me in practical every aspect. After mustering up the courage to ask her out she said yes. We've gone on several dates over the course of about 2 months. We haven't held hands, hugged, kissed (except once on the cheek) yet. This is honestly the slowest physical contact I've ever been with a woman mainly because I didn't want to rush it and screw it up with this amazing woman. I feel that if this continues without me making a move we will fall into the just friends category. Should I take a leap of faith and ask her to be romantically exclusive with each other or just keep taking it slow.
TL;DR:
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No sexual/physical contact with woman I'm dating for about 2 months now. Ask her to be my girl before its too late?
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SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: What event made you believe in karma/god/something out there? I will start...
POST: In this health class I was taking, there was an obese student who would always comment on topics in class with personal stories. These stories would go on for quite a while, and would happen every 5 -10 mins when the teacher talked about a new things. Most of the other students would tune out while said student rambled.
During one particular lengthy class which covered many topics, we moved onto the topic of obesity in the LAST 10 mins of the class. This student starts to talk about how obesity isn't an issue because it is not harming anyone, and people should be able to eat as they like...civil liberties etc.
Half way through her talking and everyone tuning out, a very loud bang. We are all startled and jump, looking around for the source of the sound. This student is sitting there awkwardly clutching to her chair. Her chair just broke.
It was so mind blowing because the timing could not have been more perfect, and the chair was made of three layers of ply wood.
TL;DR:
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10 mins before class finishes, teacher moves onto issue of obesity. Obese student talks about obesity being a no victim thing and not a big deal. Student's chair breaks.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [21F] with [??F] is threatening to find where I live and pound my face into a curb because her boyfriend[23M] asked for my number...two months ago (we never met up)
POST: So this is ridiculous. Two months ago a new employee at a smoke shop I frequent asked for my number. We spoke for the day briefly and planned to meet the next day. That night he texted me drunk asking for me to walk to his house so I could suck his dick. Needless to say we didn't meet up the next day and all contact was cut.
Today during my lunch I receive a text from an unknown number saying, "Did you know Cory has had a girlfriend this whole time?" I asked who it was and they informed they were Cory's girlfriend. She then told me I'm "not allowed" to go to the smoke shop anymore and she'll be waiting there all day everyday to "beat [my] face into a curb". I texted Cory asking him to handle his girlfriend and leave me out of their drama and since then she's been non stop texting me about how she's going to find out where I live, how she's going to be seeing me soon, and how I'll get this piss kicked out of me.
I've informed her that we never hung out, I didn't know he had a girlfriend, and her anger is misplaced and should be directed at him. No luck. I've spoken to my mother about it and she thinks I should file a police report then figure out when the owner of the smoke shop will be there and request a police escort to go speak to him about the situation. Is that too much? I definitely don't appreciate being harassed or threatened and I'm definitely angry. What do you think I should do?
TL;DR:
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Angry insecure woman who I don't know is threatening to assault me due to speaking to her boyfriend once. Should I contact the police and speak to the boyfriends manager?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My (30f) boyfriend (30m) secretly records me and it bothers me
POST: I've been dating my boyfriend for about a 7 months or so. We don't live together but he comes over to my house several times a week.
Back story:I had a really bad experience with a psycho ex blackmailing me with racy pics after I dumped him and now I'm really uncomfortable with sending nudes to anyone or them having pics/video of me on their phone without my approval. I will send sexy pics, but only I need to be the one to decide what sexy pics are on your phone and I usually crop my head out of them. I'm just not comfortable enough yet to be more open to that.
With my current BF, It started when we first started dating. I'd be in my room dancing around or even getting dressed (half naked) and my BF will be secretly record me. At first, after realizing he was recording me, he would laugh and show me. I kinda laughed it off, but told him to stop. Then he did it again another time when I was wearing little shorts and I was packing for a trip and dancing around my room. He secretly recorded me mad didn't tell me. When I asked him, he said he did. I told him it makes me feel uncomfortable and anxious when he does that, then doesn't tell me after. I told him why and he said he understood.
Last night I was standing in my room in my underwear and he secretly recorded me again and didn't tell me. I had a feeling later on in the night and asked him. He got really nervous but told me yes he filmed me for a second. He says he just likes having candid vids and pics of me on his phone. This is starting to be a serious red flag for me now. I've told him I don't mind sending him racy pics as long as I'M the one that took them. And I've said if he takes a video of me secretly, then at least show me after. He isn't really getting it, or maybe he doesn't have the best intentions and that's why he's not listening. What should I do?
TL;DR:
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My boyfriend sneaks candid videos of me doing things in my room (like dancing in small clothing or standing around with no clothes on and then doesn't tell me.) I've asked him to stop, but he keeps doing it.
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SUBREDDIT: r/personalfinance
TITLE: Any recommendations on tax relief providers?
POST: Backstory: As an uneducated young man who excelled in the sales industry years ago, I've created a ton of tax debt. Since getting my act together and a steady job, I've been paying small monthly payments for the better part of 5 years. Every month, never missing one. I looked at the details of my tax bill and found that while I owe x amount, they are increasing my balance by 1/3rd in penalties and interest even though I've been consistently paying. I can come no where close to paying off the full balance even if my wife and I saved for years. It seems like a never ending cycle. I pay x amount per yea, but with the penalties, it continues to stack up higher than the prior year. I feel that my only option is using one of those tax relief services where they negotiate your payoff balance to pennies on the dollar, however I am skeptical. Has anyone ever used these services successfully?
TL;DR:
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Owe a ton in taxes, cant afford to pay them off as the penalties and interest supersedes my contributions. Looking for help.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [17M] have no idea what to do with my [18F] ex-girlfriend
POST: I dated this girl for a few months, we'd known each other for 4 years and I moved away. We knew we were going to see each other in a year so we decided to pospone things until then. I had friends with benefits, she knew that, and she had someone to. But when I came back, she just didn't want to let go of him. We had sex a few times (I was there for 4 weeks), and since then she told me she didn't care about me and wanted me out of her life so I painfully decided to block her of all social media I had. She found a way to contact me a week and a half later, begging me to talk and since then we talked quite positively.
We just had a really rough skype discussion and she told me she still didn't want to leave this person and she wanted me out of her life again. I've not blocked her up yet, but she's gone offline everywhere, even her phone is going straight to the answering machine so I'm pretty sure she just turned it off. Reddit, I've got no idea what to do, I've been with a lot of girls in the past and only two have stuck out this much and I really want to make things work, but I've got no idea what on earth I'm supposed to do...
Thanks for the read, sorry if I took up any of you're time with my useless issue, I'd appriciate any help. I know there are other fish in the sea, but I really want her and I've got no idea what to do...
TL;DR:
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Girl and I have been in love for years, dated for a bit, she's having issues picking me over her friend with benefits, reddit what do I do :(
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Is the grass always greener, or is this just a phase?
POST: I have been dating these two girls on and off for about 1.5 years now. I am also a male in my mid 20s living in a big city.
At one point I was bf/gf with one of them for about 9 months straight. When I am with one, I miss the other, and vice versa. I seriously cannot get the one out of my head when I am with the other.
I am not sure if this is normal, and I will feel like this for the rest of my life, or if it's just because I havn't found a girl I am fully happy with yet.
On top of that, one of the girls is the most awesome chick I have ever met in my life, my parents absolutely love her, and so many more good aspects, but I still miss girl 2 when I am with her. It drives me absolutely insane.
My story is a lot more complex, but didn't want to write a wall of text.
Thanks :)
TL;DR:
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Been involved with two girls back and fourth for 1.5 years now, when I am with one, I want the other.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: Ex cheated on me, wants to get back together, i want it too, what do? I'm a [15/m]
POST: So, as a disclaimer, to most of you, and compared to the things found on this subreddit, my question will be pathetic, for at least one reason. that reason being, I'm 15. I don't know any other subreddits to go to, and i personally don't find the idea of going on omegle or chat roulette for anonymous answers exactly entertaining.
To those of you who find this to be petty, that's fine, I get it, hell, I find it petty, so you can downvote this if you like, I just need at least one person to answer.
I had a girlfriend for 2 months. She cheated on me at least twice, and after me breaking things off, over some time we started talking again, and she has feelings for me again, or so she says. I still have some feelings for her which confuses me, and I'm seriously considering getting back together with her, despite being advised against it by many.
I really like this girl guys. I'm not happy with what she's done but I've found a way to kinda not think about it most of the time. I'm convinced that if we get back together things will be different. The only real bad thing that i see coming from this is that I'll have a number of people think of me as weak, though it's not like I really care seeing as the only people i care about are my best friends, one of which is saying that i should go for it, and the other saying that he doesn't like the idea, but he isnt going to stop me.
This is very small problem but i just need some sort of answer from someone who doesnt know me or the people involved.
Thank you.
TL;DR:
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Ex cheated on me, wants to get back together, i do too, but dont know how bad of an idea it is (Im in highschool so take it with whatever level of seriousness as you think it deserves.)
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SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Any Architects on reddit want to tell me about their career?
POST: I recently received a scholarship that is allowing me to reconsider my studies and career path. I've spent all of college focused on public health, and epidemiology, I'm about to graduate and need to decide whether I want to apply to medical school or graduate school. Currently, I'm planning on pursuing an MD and/or PhD in Neuroscience. Not matriculating is not a serious worry of mine.
However as a child I was obsessive about building. I won several lego competitions and was through a stroke of madness aloud to be intimately involved in the design of my parents first home. I'm totally in love with modern architecture as well as victorian architecture.
TL;DR:
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What does it take to be an architect, how is the stress level, how creative do you really get to be, is it worth the degree, where is the field headed?
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SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: I pulled a funny internet prank I think reddit would like, but I don't know if I can present it without reddit ultimately finding out too much personal information. Advice?
POST: So my buddy welshed on a bet and in response I bought the domain www.hisname.com and I started blogging on it as him. The limited audience that's seen it thinks its pretty hilarious. He thinks its pretty hilarious, but he's also reasonably concerned because it makes him look pretty stupid.
I thought about putting it up on imgur with the url and any pictures that show him etc redacted, but I'm pretty sure no matter what I do the snoops at reddit will dox both of us, me through the domain registration and him, well because of the url.
I've actually had this problem with a few of my internet adventures, and ere'd on the side of caution, but IMO this one is REALLY funny. I feel like other redditors must have had similar conundrums.
Any ideas on how to present something in a way that limits reddit's ability to track down the source? (I know nothing is going to be foolproof, I don't underestimate you guys for a second)
TL;DR:
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I bought my buddy's name as a domain as a practical joke and started blogging on it. Any idea how I can present to reddit without giving everything away?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [17M] am considering asking a girl [19F] out, but I am not sure if she would accept because of the age difference.
POST: A bit of backstory, I am currently a high school senior, but I take all my classes at the local community college. The girl in question is a college freshman, and will be attending the same university as me next year. We get along pretty well in class. I have always been pretty mature for my age. While I don't always see this as a problem, It results in girls in high school getting on my nerves, and girls in college often feeling like I am too young. (Even though the girl in question was shocked by my age)
My concern is that she may feel a little strange, or just outright reject me because of the age difference. (She is slightly over two years older than me.) Has anyone else been in a similar situation? What would you do if you were on her side of things? Am I just over thinking this? Thanks in advance.
TL;DR:
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I am concerned that she won't accept my offer because of the age difference, even though we get along quite well.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Kind of minor, I guess, but my [28 M] wife [26 F] of four years always makes everything about her when I go to her hoping for an apology.
POST: It's like she doesn't really know how to apologize or was never taught. When she comes to me to bring up something I've done that hurt or upset her, I always apologize no matter what, even if I don't feel like I did anything wrong, because I try to see it from her perspective. If I feel like she played a part in it, I wait until later to bring it up gently.
On the other hand, if I'm the one going to her, she does not apologize - she immediately turns it on me. "Well, YOU do the same thing." or "Well I only did that because YOU __________." Even if I agree and try to talk it out, it always escalates into an argument, and I hate arguing with her, so lately I've been avoiding going to her in hopes of making amends. Instead, I bottle it up, and after awhile I snap and it all comes out at once. Then she gets REALLY upset with me. If she would just apologize and ask if we can talk more about what happened, then talk about what I did to upset her, that would be fine... great, even. But she just immediately launches into defense mode.
I don't know how to deal with this because I feel like it's just a serious maturity issue on her part. It's been going on since we met when we were teenagers and I keep hoping she'll grow out of it, but it doesn't seem to be happening anytime soon. If anything, it seems to be getting worse. Her parents are the same way and I don't see an end in sight.
I don't want it to sound like we fight all the time - we really don't, our relationship is great otherwise. Help?
TL;DR:
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My wife doesn't know how to apologize and doesn't seem remotely interested in saying she's sorry when she doesn't believe she's in the wrong.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [22F] don't know how to respond to my dad [55M] about procrastination
POST: Some background...dad and I have never been super close. My parents divorced when I was 5 and he was always a bit of a dickhead. Passive aggressiveness, verbal abuse, temper problems, etc. I haven't seen him much since I got my own car at 17 and didn't have to stay at his house every second weekend.
I've always had an fairly large problem with procrastination. I put assignments off and then finish them last minute or a week or so after the due date. My uni has a policy of only 2% penalty per day so it's really easy to justify spending an extra day working on it to make up that extra 2%. That's mostly irrelevant...I'm actively working on it and have gone from 2-3 weeks late when I was doing undergrad to a week or less late now I'm in postgrad. I'm aiming for zero late submissions this semester just because I have very limited free time so I know I need to be on top of things.
So anyway today I posted something on FB complaining that I had 5 assignments (each one about 2000 words) due in the same month. I basically said "who the hell is coordinating this topic". Dad responded with "what an excellent opportunity to practice time management!", which made me annoyed, as every single time I post something about uni, he makes a dig at me about time management. I responded with "yeah, I really relish the opportunity to be overloaded/stressed out". Not my finest moment but he seems to have missed the snark. I'm honestly just so fed up with him and this is part of an ongoing pattern of passive aggressive bullshit.
A few hours later, he posted a link "why do procrastinators procrastinate" onto my timeline. I really want to say something like "dad, please stop posting things like this every time I vent about uni", or "I'm an adult and perfectly capable of identifying and working on my weaknesses, thanks", but I know that's probably a stupid thing to do. BF thinks I should just delete his post and leave it at that, but that just seems passive aggressive right back.
TL;DR:
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dad with history of passive aggressive behaviour decides to be my personal procrastination fairy. I want him to stop. Should I say something or just leave it alone?
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SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU accidentally sending my friend to the hospital
POST: So today in Spanish class, my friend (I'll call him John) showed up with the most inflated hand ever. Like seriously, on John's left hand you can still see his bones and stuff but his right hand was like a ball with some small french fries sticking out as his fingers. He then told us it was just a mosquito bite, so me and my friends started joking around about John's hand and eventually showed the teacher just for fun. The teacher got all serious and stuff and then sent John to the principal.
15 minutes later he came back with an ice pack on his hand and told us he had to go to the hospital... Then my friends and I bursted in laughter. It was the funniest thing ever. The thing is though, we were getting many of our exam reviews and had an in-class exam the same day, and he missed it all. Welp, sucks for him.
A few hours later however, I texted John and poked fun at his hand and what not and then he told me that his hand actually had some serious infection.
Fuck up? Yeah, a bit... But at the same time I feel like a fucking hero.
TL;DR:
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Accidentally sent my friend to hospital because of a mosquito bite. He missed an exam but turns out he had a serious infection.
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SUBREDDIT: r/askwomenadvice
TITLE: How to make a weekend in Boston special?
POST: I was in Las Vegas in March for a friend's bachelor's party and, on my last full night there, I met this girl from California in a club. I'm not usually one for clubs but we immediately hit it off in a big way. She ended up having to leave early that evening because her friend got too drunk but we met up for a drink the next day before I had to leave. It was amazing how many things we had in common, I could have talked to her for hours if I didn't have to catch my flight. Right before I left she told me that she'd never felt immediately as comfortable with someone as she did with me and I definitely felt the same. Even though I had only known her briefly, I was smitten. Unfortunately, I live on the East coast. For the next few months we talked almost every day, although it did slow down a little bit after maybe month four when I started seeing someone.
Well I'm single now (have been for a little over a month). She told me a few weeks ago that she's going to be visiting her sister in Massachusetts and, since that's relatively close to me, we decided to spend the weekend together in Boston. I'm so excited! I know better than to over-think/over-plan but I'm trying to figure out a way to make our time there really special. What can I do to make the weekend special?
TL;DR:
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I met a girl in Vegas in March and was immediately smitten. We're spending a weekend together in Boston, how can I make it awesome?
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SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by inadvertently flirting with my kid's coach
POST: I was talking to my kid's soccer coach, and this young woman mentioned that she is studying film and culture, and watching some old movies is part of what she does. We talked about some of those, and I suggested some old ones that she indicated she would like to watch.
Also, apparently, I don't take social clues very well. Somewhat impaired in that respect, you might say.
I loove old classic movies, so of course I suggested some, and later on invited, through Facebook, to go watch one of those movies. You know, Eisenstein, Ridley Scott, etc.
Well, other parents were not that happy, because they thought I was flirting with the assistant coach. Dirty old married man, thinking of classic movies with a person that is studying communication, what a depraved thing to do!
Silent treatment has ensued, parents look at me like they want to scold me, head coach is super serious now, and this young woman, the assistant coach, won't even look at me.
The season is still going on, and I am debating whether to take my kid out of the team, given that the coaches are quite cross with me, and the other parents are way too indignant about my social faux pas.
TL;DR:
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you can invite a man to a beer and it is OK. Invite a woman to a movie and the whole world loses its mind.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [20 M] with my friend I guess [19 F] of two dates, testing me? IDK
POST: So I've gone out twice with this girl and we've texted a fair bit, but I'm not sure what's going through her mind. Maybe our text conversations can give some context:
So after waiting for her to get back to me about Friday night working she replies:
Her: "Hey! So I tried to make room for tonight, but it just didn't work out. I'm so sorry!
Me: Don't worry about it! Will tomorrow night work better?"
Her:"Would you kill me if i said that I don't know yet? (teeth face), I was officially accepted into OSU today. So, all my friends and I are celebrating tomorrow. I'm not sure of the timing yet though."
Me: "Ah congrats! That's awesome! And that's fine haha :)"
I was a little disappointed at this point because I had been planning this date out a little bit and she didn't really get a time in which we could reschedule, so I decided that I would just forget about her for awhile and just move on.
Two days later she texts me: "Hey! You down to do something sometime this week :)"
Me: " Yeah sure! Did you have something in mind? :)"
Her: "No hah, I have no idea haha!"
Me: "Wanna do something a bit more relaxing or something outgoing?"
Her: "Hmm relaxing maybe?"
Me: "We could just like watch a movie at one of our houses or something :)"
Her: "Okay, except I can't today. It's girls night hah."
Me: "No I can't today either, I was just meaning whenever. When's a good time for you?
Her: "Hmmm I'm not too sure. I'm going out of town for the weekend. It's up in the air though if we're coming back Saturday or Sunday."
Me: "Up in the air works haha. Where are you going? :)"
And this was the last message I sent her and I'm waiting back now. Thanks for the help guys!
TL;DR:
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Basically I don't know what's going through her mind, first she invites me to hang out with her, then like is too busy. What's your guys's opinions?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Girlfirend [19] of 3 years let me[20] go for another guy
POST: Girlfriend of three years has been seeing another guy for the past few months, i tried saving us but it was obvious it wasnt going to happen. This was a girl that told me explicitly she would never cheat or go behind my back as she wouldnt want the same thing ot happen to her. Glad she held her word. Its been a couple weeks, i keep very loose ties with her as i know talking to her only makes the pain so much worse. Shes still talking to the new guy and seeing him. Despite her saying it would be better if she didnt talk to either of us. Not sure why i still trusted her word then. Shes sorry for what she did to me and says she still loves and cares about me and wants to see me. (I know that wont work in the end) Yet, weve been through hell and back but i guess that wasnt enough for her. Her 20th birthday just passed and i skipped it and got drunk in austin instead. Still came around and dropped off flowers and a card because i still care. Dont know if should though at this point.
In the end shes sad but im sure coping well because she has someone to turn to. While in here, fucking sad and miserableb with no one to turn to or truly understand what im feeling. because what was my SO let me go and is okay with it from what it feels like. I know theres more fish in the sea blah blah but man am i at a low. I never deserved this yet still go it. Ive been hanging out with friends as much as possible and keeping busy but it still isnt enough...
How do i cope? Im a wreck with my college classes and work for the past few weeks.
Sorry for any typos and what not.
TL;DR:
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girlfriend of three years was choosing bewteen me and another guy, i knew it was iver between us. I ended it. Now im sure shes soding fine and im a wreck. What do i do to cope?
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SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: "My" house was just foreclosed. My Dad left me holding the bag. What do I do now???
POST: Brief history- In 2006, when I was 22, my father approached me with a proposition to buy a house. It would be solely in my name and he would make all the payments. I would stay there rent free while completing my undergrad as long as I did all the fix-ups around the property (tear up old carpet, paint, landscape etc.) and my credit would go up. My dad would make the payments and when we went to flip the house, he would keep the profit; free rent throughout college for me, a good profit for him.
Long story short, we had a falling out and he stopped making payments. The house has now gone to judicial foreclosure (Ohio). It was sold on 2-17-12 at a sheriff sale back to the lender that owns the larger mortgage on the house (there are two 127K & 25K). It was purchased back for 114K.
I am now a graduate student and resident of California. I make 16K a year while attending school. I recently married this past October. My credit score has tanked to 601 and will probably fall further. The smaller mortgage lender (25K) has contacted me to try to settle for 10% of what is owed if I do it by the end of this month (Feb). The larger mortgage doesn't have the information yet, so they say.
These are my questions:
What can I do about the deficiency? Can they hound me and liquidate my assets? Do/Should I have to declare bankruptcy? If so, what does that entail? Can they come after my wife?
TL;DR:
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Dad screwed me, house foreclosed in Ohio, I'm stuck with all debt, I'm a student in CA. What should my next move be?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [33/F] with my now ex friend[33 M]. He's a lazy freeloader and a subtle racist/misogynist. Was I hasty in blocking him/ending the friendship?
POST: I reconnected via facebook with a friend I went to high school with awhile ago. We hung out all the time when we first reconnected, circa 2009, after I had moved back to our hometown. However, I went back to college and graduated in 2011, and got a job in New York. At the end of February 2014, I came back because of ailing family members.
Anyway, this guy is like a manchild. He is 33, lives at home with his mother, and hasn't worked in 5 years. He brags about how his enabling mother pays for his car, iphone, Apple TV, even buys him new iPhones and iPads whenever new ones come out, even if there is nothing wrong with the ones he already has. He also feels *entitled* to all of this. He sees nothing wrong with his childish lifestyle.
Sure, he has some mental health stuff going on. However, nothing so severe that he can't work at least part time, or do something with his life. I guess I am just at a point in life where I do not want to be friends with losers, specifically losers who can't see that there is something wrong with the way they are living, like this guy.
Anyway, last night was the last straw. I posted something saying that rape jokes aren't funny, and he proceeds to tell me all the reasons he has every right to laugh at them. Then, it turned to his right as a white guy to laugh at horribly racist things like minstrel shows and blackface. Of course, as an African American woman, I was offended by this. I had already been thinking I didn't want to be friends with someone who is nothing but a mooch and a freeloader whose life is going nowhere fast, but the bigotry was the last straw, and I blocked him. I also added his number to the Dead2Me graveyard on my Android.
So, are my reasons for not wanting to be friends with this person and cutting them off valid, or did I let anger make me make a hasty decision?
TL;DR:
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I cut a friend who is a lazy freeloading bum and a subtle racist/misogynist off. Am I wrong for doing this?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: My friends say he's clueless. I say he's not interested. What do you say, RA?
POST: I liked what I saw, so I went for it. It was scary as hell, but I managed. I spoke to this guy a few days before Christmas, just before the semester let out. We live in different towns (when out of school) so it would be a few weeks before we could meet up in person again.
During this time, though, we spent hours chatting online and texting back and forth. Our conversations would go on until two or three in the morning. Finally, we made plans to go watch Avatar 3D.
I was thrilled. We have so much in common, we discovered. The man is *brilliant*, and gorgeous (in my opinion). So we meet up to watch the movie. And then It happens. We're both shy and a bit awkward. It's a little quiet but he manages to crack jokes before and during the movie. I laugh. The movie is great, and it comes time for me to drive him home. We have a nice talk on the way, more jokes, etc.
I thought things went well - but there was no kiss. Not even a hug. There was a moment of awkwardness, though, when he sort of turned to me and laughed nervously, but he continued on his way. He said he had fun. But I didn't really hear from him for the next week.
This is why I think he's not interested. Now, I have limited experience so I don't really know how to read this stuff. The thing is, though, that I have *some* experience. The guy has none. He has never had a girlfriend. In fact, he has never been told he is attractive until I said so the day we went to watch the movie. He said he didn't know what to say because it was the last thing he ever expected to hear from anyone.
My friends say I should hold out for a while because he might not know what to do. I kind of think that's bullshit, though, because if he were interested, wouldn't things continue as before? I think I'm overthinking things again, but I value your opinion very much.
TL;DR:
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met a guy, thought we hit it off, went to see a movie, didn't hear from him again for a week and now I'm positive he's not interested, but my friends say I should wait it out.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [20M] am not sure what me and this girl [20F] "are" for lack of a better term, and I don't know how to ask.
POST: We initially dated for a little bit and then it was broken off because she had some pretty bad personal issues going on and said she didn't want to date anyone while trying to fix them, and I understood that. So we agreed to be friends and we've since become pretty close. It's been two months since we stopped dating and recently she started getting more flirty/sexual in her texts, even sexting me once. We've cuddled a little and held hands recently too, something we stopped doing after becoming just friends. I've tried to bring up the "what are we?" question and she just said she isn't sure what we are right now, but she likes it and doesn't want to ruin it. The last time we hung out I put my arm around her and she kind of just sat there awkwardly and I could feel her heart beating fast, so I thought she was uncomfortable and took it off.
I'm really confused because I don't think we're on the same page. I don't want to push her comfort levels and do something she doesn't want to and end up ruining everything, but at the same time I don't want her to think I don't like her anymore because I won't initiate much contact.
How do I ask her what we are without making her feel pressured? I really don't want to lose her but this is all really bugging me because it's really confusing.
TL;DR:
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Dated a girl and ended up just becoming friends, she's started giving mixed signals she still likes me but I don't know how to bring it up.
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SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU: By trying to do the right thing by my dealer
POST: So this weekend, I was out with a girl, who asked if I had any snow. So being the nice guy I am, I said no, but let me see if I can get us some, and I texted my friend to see if she could get some.
My girl decides that she doesn't want any, so now I am stuck...and I decide that I don't want to be "that guy" who asks for something, then backs out, so I agree to buy it.
I drive out to the place, and it's not there yet- going to be an hour. Well, I have an early day the next day, so I give them my cash, (these are good friends that I trust) and say I'll get it from them another time.
I roll out, and tell another buddy that he can take it off my hands if he wants to, just re-imburse me. Saturday night rolls around, and I hear from him that he's going to take it off my hands. I drop by and get a couple of bumps from him, and go on home, exhausted from my long day of driving.
Monday rolls around, and boom! I get popped for a random drug test. I'm freaking out, and drinking water like a fish, trying to flush my system out. As it turns out, I have a relative in the hospital, so I'm able to skip out of work with that as an excuse, and haven't heard from the test administrator as of yet, so I think I'm in the clear, as it was a very small amount, and it's been over 72 hours now.
TL;DR:
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Didn't want to be "that guy" who asks for stuff and then backs out, buys stuff I didn't want, sold it to a friend, took a couple of bumps, and almost got popped on a random drug screen.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [20/F] Having problems communicating with recently long-distance SO [19/M] of 1.5 years
POST: Ok, so as the title says my boyfriend and I have been together for about a year and a half. About 2 months ago I had to move 2 hours away from him (he doesn't have a car, so all transportation is left to me). I know 2 hours is barely considered long distance, but it's a really dramatic change from the spending every night together that we had before I moved.
Anyway, since the move we've been having some troubles communicating. I feel lately like he has barely any interest in talking to me. Every conversation we have is started by me and mostly carried by me. I've tried talking to him about the whole thing and he just writes me off. I tried talking to him about it again today and he said that me bringing it up and trying to fight about it was a massive turn off. I wasn't trying to start any fights, and I don't really see how it could have been interpreted like that. He always says that he likes having his space and enjoys being alone. I need more contact than that. I've tried to tell him I feel neglected and he just shrugs it off, or half-heartedly tells me that he'll try harder. But nothing ever improves.
It's not like I'm requesting constant contact or to always know where he is. If he had his way we would probably talk once a week or less.
We've been fighting more lately, too, and he tells me that I'm always the one to start the fights and that I start them over nothing. He says he's tired of talking about our relationship. But every fight we have isn't resolved because he just shrugs off any sort of meaningful conversation. He never wants to talk about anything serious. I feel like my feelings aren't valid. He makes me feel like an idiot for wanting to talk to him. I'm still adjusting to barely seeing him, but it seems like for him their was no adjustment needed. I almost feel like he's happier with me gone.
No matter which way I approach it, trying to communicate with him about the issue doesn't seem to help. How do you talk about your inability to talk to each other?
What do I do now?
TL;DR:
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Newly long distance boyfriend has little interest in talking to me, and blows me off when I try to talk about it or find a solution to our communication problems.
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SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by drawing a historically accurate battlescene
POST: So this Fuckup actually happend a few years ago but i wanted to share it anyway. And sorry if my english is not the best, i'm not a native speaker.
As a boy growing up watching historic documentaries and war-themed movies, I imagined such scenarios and often drew pictures of them. Almost every boy, i think, played solidier as kid.. As i have no skill when it comes to drawing, my pictures are confined to basic 2D-Landscapes with houses and tanks, your basic kid drawing. As i was attending what is the german equivalent of middle school, i kept drawing such pictures when i was bored. Here is where the fuck up begins!
I was sitting in class and i drew my basic kind of painting i always draw but i thought, this time i will be all smartpants and make it "accurate". So i drew 2 fractions, 2 teams, the Allies and the nazis. As i wanted to be accurate, i decorated every tank or building belonging to a team with its "icon", means i drew losts of swastikas. As it so happend my german teacher noticed my painting and asked me what i was drawing i replied a "historically correct battle!". She gave me the awkwardest look and I was so perplex because i didnt know if i had done anything wrong. Anyway a few days later my parents came into my room i asked me what kind of paintings in draw in school. I was confused and asked why they wanted to know that. Apparently my german teacher gave my parents a call to ask if they were nazi enthusiasts or something like that. I told the intension of the picture and they laughed but my german teacher always gave me that stare when he walked past me.
TL;DR:
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drew a historically accurate battlefield with swastikas in school and made my teacher believe, that my parents are nazis.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: how can I get this girl with commitment issues to trust and date me?
POST: How can I get this girl with commitment issues to trust and date me?
I've(21) been seeing this girl(19) for about a few months, but Ive known her for about a year. This is the second time we've gotten together. The first time we were just pretty much friends with benefits until feelings got tied in. We both liked another, but I was scared and not ready to have a relationship yet so I break it off.
Seven months go by, no talking, my roommate(20) brings her home. My heart suddenly dropped. I realized my feelings were still there for her, and I was ready for a relationship. My roommate and her had a thing going on for about a month, then she finds out scary news. Shes pregnant. I'm the first person she tells(we started talking again from the moment she came to my house). She ends up breaking it off with my roommate because of the child, and Im with her the whole time beside her. Complications happened between her and her mother, and had to get an abortion... Doing my best to comfort her, she says she wants space, so we take a week off from another. Worst week of my life, I'll tell you what.
She ends up texting me(at this point we've been kissing off and on, cuddling), and things have gone the same way. We she starts to get a little frisky with me as we gradually get more comfortable with another again. Yesterday my roommate found out that we had a thing for another and she got worried because they still had feelings for another. I just ended up, pretty much confessing my love for her, and I knew it was a bad idea. Then today she says she doesn't feel the same as before, but she still likes me. I ask her "what has changed? Are you just scared of the commitment?" She said "yes, I already told you that". I want nothing in the world than to be with this woman.
Please help me.
TL;DR:
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girl(19) likes me but has commitment issues, and there's nothing I want more than to be with her...
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: (Update)How difficult is a relationship supposed to be? It's almost like my GF is trying to make me feel bad. [24m 21f 1 year dating]
POST: Previous link:
I talked to my girlfriend yesterday and at first, she was pretty hostile. She basically kept blaming me for her behaviour (because I was in a bad mood, she did X terrible thing). She said she "loved me but wasn't in love with me anymore, but wanted to be again."
We didn't seem to be getting anywhere, until I showed her the Reddit topic. She read the entire thing and seemed to understand that she is really terrible to me. She realizes that she's mean to me and that I deserve better, but that she loves me so much and wants to try her best to fix things.
I'm leaving for a trip in 10 days (gone for a month), so I agreed to see if we could make things work out by then. So, at this point, I'm trying to be cautious but optimistic. I don't know what or how I can determine if she's just being nice temporarily or if she's actually going to make meaningful change. Any ideas?
TL;DR:
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Giving girlfriend a chance to improve. She seems genuinely interested in improving, but I'm making sure to see if she actually shows improvement.
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SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Am I going to die tomorrow?(Craigslist meeting)
POST: So I'm selling something on craigslist and this guy calls me and offers me exactly what I'm wanting for it ( Its a higher priced item). He says he has been in town only a few months and his car is broken down so he needs me to meet him at his place. So he gives me the address and its on this dead end street with one house at the end (kind of in the middle of no where) with a small cemetery right next to it. Its kinda got me feeling like I'm going to get robbed or killed or both. Just wanting opinions.
TL;DR:
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Meeting some guy from craigslist, he wants to meet in a really sketchy place and I don't want to die or get robbed. need opinions.
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SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Askreddit, what is your best 'How are you still alive?!' story. I'll start.
POST: My younger brother, when he was 12 or 13 - old enough to know better - decided to help out by mowing the lawn. When he needed to fill up the mower with gasoline, he couldn't get the lid off the metal container. I don't know what the fuck he was thinking but he somehow decided it would be a good idea to use a *blowtorch* to open *the metal container full of a highly flammable substance.*
It did not go well.
He blew up/burned down our garage, garden shed, car that the insurance ran out on two days before and we'd forgotten to renew, and most of our newly renovated kitchen. I was with my mum when she got the call - 'Something just exploded at your house, everything's on fire, your son WAS in the garden but I can't find him now.' Holy shit. We were only a few blocks away, got back in record time just as the firetrucks arrived. Probably lucky we didn't crash as she was driving in sheer blind panic. Two seconds later he comes out of the flaming rubble with a sheepish grin like he'd been caught stealing cookies or something. He somehow got away with very minor burns on the hand holding the container and without brows or lashes; not a scratch apart from that. I have no freaking idea how that's even possible.
He really thought he would be in huge trouble for practically burning the house down/being a total fucking idiot. We were just happy he was alive, he got all the ice-cream and video games he could handle for oh, at least a week.
TL;DR:
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my dumbass younger brother tried to open a gasoline can with a blowtorch. Predictable fiery results. Walked away mostly unscathed.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My wife [29 F] is in love with someone else [Me M 28], been together 4-5 years.
POST: So it's been a while since I've been on reddit to post, but I think I need the opinion of strangers, and there's no one in real life I can actually ask.
MY wife went on a trip a month ago to see an old friend, when she came back she was significantly colder to me, I took it as a sign to up my game and be a more understanding husband. Well it turns out that while she was seeing this old friend she realized she loves him and he loves her; and they admitted as much to each other. She was being cold cause she didn't know how to face me.
She told me (which I respect) and said she didn't do anything with him, but that she wanted to kiss him at least, and that she had a really great time. He has a girlfriend and apparently she was weirded out by how close they were together, so it's probably a problem for his girlfriend as much as it is for me.
She started talking about the nature of marriage and love and how it shouldn't be so binary, she talked vaguely around how she understands open relationships a lot more now. I'm not an aggressive or loud person, so I reacted as calmly as I could, I've tried to ask as many questions as I can to understand what happened, and she's been good about answering what she can.
Our relationship has always been romantic and close and lovely, and she said she's scared that this will change things. I'm hurt and I'm scared, and I want to be clear about my feelings but I don't want to push her away. I feel like one of us is being incredibly selfish and I don't know who it is.
Said she doesn't want to leave me, but doesn't want me giving her preconditions on what she can or can't do; said she wouldn't promise not to see him and even implied that she wasn't sure she could trust her self around him (I prompted her to say it, she didn't bring it up).
I don't know if I want advice or just to talk about it, its been two days since the 'event' and I'm still unsure how I feel.
TL;DR:
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wife loves another guy with me, is unwilling to break of contact, still loves me too, I don't know how to feel. (not into non-traditional relationship).
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SUBREDDIT: r/jobs
TITLE: So... my managers are setting traps for me so that they can build documentation to fire me
POST: I work in a typical office setting. Basically, I called out two managers in defense for basically doing incompetent work after they both tried to scapegoat me for their own mistakes. The problem is, they're 2 out of the 4 middle managers in my group and I have to have a working relationship with them.
Their response was to put together a lengthy, vague, and poorly documented complaint that I promptly shredded word for word, with supporting emails, in my response.
The problem now is that I need to have my work "assessed" and they're responsible for a large part of the assessment. The problem is that in this assessment, they've basically been giving me assignments with intentionally missing, contradictory, and misleading instructions. When I send it to them, they throw up their hands and say, "Well, you should have asked me. It's your fault this is wrong." Then, when I've asked them to clarify their expectations, they've gone to their superiors and told them that I was being confrontational, asking questions about things I should know from experience, wasting their time, (blatant lie, but too much detail for upper management to investigate) and questioning their intelligence by asking stupid questions. I don't know what to do at this point. How do I deal with this before getting fired?
TL;DR:
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Managers are intentionally giving me bad instructions to get me fired, then telling their managers I'm asking wasting time if I try to ask questions to figure out what the hell they actually want done
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [19M] found out my girlfriend [20F] kissed a guy she met 1 year ago at a mental hospital
POST: My girlfriend [20F] and I met about 4 years ago as friends. We got in touch this summer and we started a wonderful relationship (relationship for about 4 months now). I learned she has some mental issues dealing with dreams/delusions and had been in a mental hospital.
While in the mental hospital, she met a guy who shared similar delusions. Both of them went out for about 3 months, ending the spring before the summer her and I met. I always knew she empathized for him (I still would talk to my ex's if I met up with them, just because I care about them, but not in a romantic way).
About 2 months into our relationship, this guy wanted to go on a hike, which I trusted her on. Afterward, my girlfriend admitted that he was still attached to her and we both agreed they should stop talking until he has moved on.
While engaging in foreplay last night she started crying. Sometimes this occurs when a bad memory of her first sexual boyfriend pops up, who abused her. However, she ended up admitting that the guy from the hospital had called her up and they went to meditate in a park. While in a trance-like state she kissed him.
I contained my anger and she called him on the phone in front of me, told him to not call her again, and deleted all messages he has sent her. I follow Koran-style forgiveness, where there's only 1 time of forgiveness for the same 'crime', and told her this was her last chance. I told her why this is a very hard thing to do, how I'd sooner be done with her than keep suffering again and again and again. How much I love her and know she can do better.
She went to a therapist today and I gave her my journal with three pages I wanted her to read. She was told to read them aloud at the meeting to feel the gratitude I've had for her with regards to security, respect, and compassion in our past. She says she wants to make this work and be in control of herself.
Did I do the right thing?
TL;DR:
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Girlfriend cheats on me with an old mental hospital acquaintance, I give her a firm second chance. Did I do the right thing?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: Seeing my best friend's ex / my ex's friend
POST: I just recently began seeing a girl who was one of my best friend's ex in highschool. She's also friends with my ex. It's been years since they've gone out with each other and it's been about 4 months since I've broken up with my ex. I'm 22 btw. I do believe my friend may have some left over feelings for her.. We both very much are attracted to each other...I don't know how to go about bringing this up to my friend. My friend and I literaly chill everyday, I just don't have the heart to man up and tell it to him straight.
Lastly, we don't live near each other, so we pretty much text all day. I feel as though this is also a bad idea, to be continually texting...possibly leading to us having nothing to talk about when we see each other on the weekend?
TL;DR:
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I don't know how to go about speaking to my best friend about seeing his ex, who most likely still has feelings for her. Finally, how to proceed with constant texting with the woman
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Is it worth it? Am i wasting my youth away?
POST: I am 18, male, single and from Singapore.
brief intro, i am an only child and am keep few friends. unfortunately, all of them are either overseas studying or in the army. i study computer engineering in school and my family is migrating after i'm done with conscription.
no intention to sound condescending but i'm a self made entreprenuer and trader. i enjoy what i am doing and the benefits i receive; my goal is to be a self made millionaire by 25. However, i feel very alone quite often. it's like all the priviledges are not enjoyable without someone else.
another issue is that my mum recently said,"i'm not mature enough to have a girlfriend". i thought she was very blunt. also not on the best terms with my mum(to me at least). sometimes the last thing i need to hear after a full day of school from 9-5 is nagging. can't even recall when the last time i received a compliment.
i have been urged by one of my best friends to "get" a girlfriend as he mentioned that it would take my mind off work(keeping up with the market and other endeavors).
at some point in time, i wonder what the heck i'm doing. what am i looking at S&P 500, what am i sending all these emails to. why am i not out with a bunch of people.
TL;DR:
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Mandatory summary/question! is it worth it spending my youth on things(beneficial) normal teens do not do at all?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I (23m) feel like my relationship with my gf (23f) is suddenly falling apart
POST: I've never posted or told anyone this but here it goes...
So I've been going out with my gf for around 7 months and it's been going so well. At least I thought it was.
Tomorrow was a free day so I told her to come over but then a uni friend message me asking to be part of a focus group so I thought... yes I'll come along and help! While I'm there, I'll do my own uni stuff too! So I let her know my plans and told her to join me.
Then all of a sudden she says oh so you've made plans and not included me in it, we never chill, how could you suddenly make plans?
Am I in the wrong here? I made some plans and she's complaining that I'm selfish and never spend time with her.
I admit, I do have a lot going on compared to her and I'm a very socialable guy who talks to everyone whereas if there's someone that she's never met or hardly spoke to she gets shy and hardly talks.
Has anyone been or in this situation? I do feel we spend alone at a fair amount (like few times a month, is that even enough?)
Sorry for the rant... I need someones help or advice to save this relationship :( :(
TL;DR:
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I think my gf wants to break up with me because I don't spend much time with here. I'm a socialable guy, she's a shy girl.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My boyfriend [17m] is allowed to sleep with other girls; but i'm [17f] not allowed to sleep with other guys?
POST: This is understandably a really, really odd situation. Throwaway cause boyfriend's on reddit. But i do check this account often. Basically me and my boyfriend have been together for 2.5 years, and we were each other's first everything. We are quite sexually mature, we partake in a lot of light BDSM type stuff, choking, rope and tape, humiliation... You know, regular teenager stuff. I guess there comes a point where he got bored or something.
Anyway. Flashback to 6 months ago. I realize I'm bisexual. I ask for permission to explore this further with this girl I knew who'd be up for it. He agrees and says he'd be happy to let me explore my sexuality with girls. Awesome! Lasts for like a month, cut short because of the other girl. Thats long past now, and a couple weeks ago he brought up the point that he's very curious about being with other people. I totally understood, and thought since I was allowed at one point, it only makes sense that he should be given the same opportunity... I wasn't thrilled about it at first but I came to my senses.
So now he's been messing around with a female friend of ours, everything seems fine, it's going well actually. The problem is I'm really curious about being with other guys... and due to my boyfriends rules, me being with another guy is ultimately forbidden. I can't even bring it up without him getting upset. I'm allowed to be with other girls, but no guys. Final. But what I want is to try things out with another guy!
Is he being stubborn or am I being unreasonable? I don't even know anymore, our sexual relationship is so out there, I have no idea what's considered normal or not anymore.
TL;DR:
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my boyfriend is allowed to be with other girls, and so am I. I'm bisexual. But under no means am I allowed to explore with other guys. Is this unreasonable?
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SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Should I ask my evil sister to leave the hospital so I can have some quiet alone time with my mom?
POST: Here's my last thread:
I really need some quick advice! My sister is attached to my mom's hip and I can't talk to my mom without my sister butting in every damn conversation. Me and my wife have come to really dislike my sister (see previous thread) My wife refuses to visit my mom in the hospital after surgery if my sister is there. She has asked me to call my sister and say something to the affect of "Hey, so you've been at the hospital for a long time. When we show up, would you mind giving us some privacy?"
I wish my wife could just put up with my sister, it makes me so angry that she can't be the bigger person for 30 effin minutes, but my marriage is also way more important to me than my slightly disfunctional family.... What should I do?!?!
TL;DR:
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should I make an awkward call to my sister asking her to leave my mom's hospital room when I show up, or should I just go by myself (again)?
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: What is it like to be in love in a marriage?
POST: Let me clarify:
I am 20 years old and I have been in a relationship for over 3 years now. I feel like I love my SO - I am constantly thinking about him, I plan my week around being with him, we talk about our future, etc. However recently I've realised that maybe this relationship is not going to last, as we have grown from teenagers into young adults and we are both maturing. I feel like I'm not ready to commit which makes me question...am I really in love?
Reading about it on the internet (I can't make life decisions based off of other anecdotal evidence, but just to get an understanding) and a lot of people write that it's easy to think you're in love when your young. Teenagers (or in my case, young adults) tend to confuse sex and friendship with "love". These people go on to state that real love - usually in older and married adults - means selflessness, sacrifices being made and a deep emotional attachment to your SO. I *feel* like this is what I have, but how can I know? Is it one of those things that if you question it, it's probably not true?
I suppose I am asking what love really is. And if anyone has had a long term relationship in their teenage years, did it carry on to adulthood? Why or why not?
TL;DR:
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questioning whether or not my young mind is capable of real love, wondering about other people's experiences of "love" at a young age and what love is like when you are married.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [F/20] fear that I am starting to resent my SO [22] of 3 years after a hard year. I need your advice, Reddit.
POST: I have been in a relationship for 3 years with my boyfriend [22] and will have lived with him for 1 year this December. It's been a hard year for us and I have been feeling less and less attracted to him as the days go on. I used to never want to be without him, now I am looking for reasons to leave the house and be alone and it upsets me greatly. I still deeply care about him, and we also have a house (renting) and a puppy together. I am thinking about taking a break from living together and moving into my dad's house for a few weeks, but he says he doesn't believe in breaks. I'm out of ideas as to how I can feel like I am attracted to him again, I don't want to lose him.
Does anyone have any experience with taking a "break" for a while with their SO? How did it go? Did it help?
TL;DR:
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Relationship is stale and I am wanting to take a break by moving out for a bit but I need more ideas as to how to keep my relationship from falling apart in the future
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SUBREDDIT: r/Pets
TITLE: Kitten - 15 weeks old - "Cold" symptoms ever since we got her.
POST: Good evening,
I understand that most of you are not veterinarians, but perhaps you could shed some insight or personal knowledge toward our concerns. My wife and I bought a ragdoll kitten from a registered breeder on Dec 18, 2013. We've had her for 3 weeks now and her "cold" symptoms have not seemed to improve. Here is some relevant information:
- As soon as we got her, her eyes were a tad irritated and quite a lot of sneezing, got a vet appointment the next morning - received antibiotic ointment and 2nd round of booster shots were postponed.
- All visible symptoms after 10 days vanished, however, sneezing persisted.
- Right before new years, sneezing was much more frequent. Regardless, vet proceeded with 2nd round of booster shots.
- Shortly after new years and until present time, A LOT of sneezing (~30 times a day) and visible yellow discharge from both eyes and nose. The discharge appears to irritate the eyes a tad much like in humans, I use a cotton ball dipped in warm water to rub away some of this discharge.
- We live in a new condo building, but the ventilation system tends to shoot a lot of dust out.
We are not overly concerned about this as the symptoms are, in our eyes, not severe (ie. she is not lethargic, eats well, pees in the right spot, and is incredibly playful). However, these "cold" symptoms have persisted for nearly 3 weeks. My hypothesis is that she was initially fighting a respiratory infection and the 2nd round of booster shot perhaps negatively impacted her immune system causing the sickness to return.
TL;DR:
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cat sneezes a fuckload, may have a cat cold, 2nd round of boosters may have caused her immune system to go derp, cat sick for long time.
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SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: $360 in Best Buy Rewards... if only they had the selection! (27" LED Monitor is the Goal)
POST: Through judicious acquisition of Best Buy Reward points, I have $360 worth of certificates ready to spend, and the only item I want is a 27" LED monitor for my Apple Mac Mini (the new model with HDMI and MiniDisplayPort).
The problem is, the only 27" LED monitors they have in stock are the [Samsung S27A550H] ($399.99) and the [Apple LED Cinema Display] ($939.99 right now). They have a few more online only, from HP, Acer, and LG, but all things being equal, I'd feel more comfortable picking up my monitor from a brick & mortar location.
So Reddit, I ask you, what do you recommend I do? I can't get my head around spending ~$600 on the Apple monitor, but the Samsung doesn't really wow me either.
Have any of you run into this issue? Should I wait for new monitors to hit the Best Buy shelves, or keep acquiring points until the Apple display is more within reach? Are there any services for exchanging these certificates for cash?
TL;DR:
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I want to buy a 27" LED monitor, but it has to be at Best Buy with their Rewards Certificates, and they don't have a very good selection.
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SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by doing a grand romantic gesture
POST: Short background - So I broke up with my last ex-girlfriend few months ago. Long-distance relationship, I made some mistakes (never cheated on her, just having a ridiculous personality) - you know the drill. She actually wanted me back right after we broke up but I just kept being stubborn and left it at that, we haven't talked since. She blocked me on Facebook, I don't have her number or any other way to contact her. Recently I moved to a city that's close to where she lives, by approximately 5 hour long bus ride. You probably see where this is going by now...
Last night I came home drunk (correction, NOW you see where this is going), had all the emotions I kept inside just boil and broke down crying like a hungry toddler about how much I miss her and how good she was for me. And I had the best idea ever - I'll just do a super huge romantic gesture like they do in those movies with Hugh Grant and show up in her town to talk to her.
I'm sitting on a bus now on my way there, sober and ashamed of myself, so I might as well just leave this here for you, so you would know that somewhere in this world there is this stupid desperate guy who watches way too many movies.
I saw a rainbow an hour ago, that's a symbol of hope right? Hope my ass.
Plot twist - I messaged her friend to ask if I could talk to her, she said my ex left the town last night so as soon as I get there, I'll have to take the next bus back home.
TL;DR:
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I humiliated myself by taking an expensive 10 hour bus ride that was supposed to be public humiliation of myself in front of my ex, begging her to give me a chance.
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SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by using shampoo as lube
POST: Hi! It's my first time, so be gentle? Don't know if this counts as NSFW, but I'm posting it on a Monday.
Keeping the tradition alive, I would like to say this did not happen today, but a few years ago. Long enough, in fact, to put me to the ol' "horny teen" years. Now my dear Reddit, I'm sure you know what those years are like. If I was alone, I made to sure make use of it by ,*ahem*, "choking the chicken", as it were. I always did it in the bathroom, after perfecting the art of faking poops. One particular day, I was having a little trouble getting over the edge, so I wondered how to spice things up a little. This birthed my fuck up.
Looking around in that bathroom, my horny self concluded that shampoo was the best lube I could get. For those of you who do not know, shampoo dries the skin. See where I'm going? This time, things went fine. I neared the edge, bellowed in a fit of Viking pleasure, "shot the gun"' and cleaned up.
Skip forward some time. Still used the shampoo daily, but now I'm starting to get an itchy feeling on me dear plums. I thought nothing of it. Oh dear, Reddit, how that was a mistake. I used the shampoo again, woke up the next day, and found that my berries were about as dry as a desert and had crispy/dehydrated skin peeling off whenever I moved.
And sweet God, the pain...
Each step was like my little soldiers had been flayed and burned at the stake. Whenever guests came by I would slap on a smile and pretend that Satan was not using my boys like a strawberry-scented Newton's Cradle. My junk has thankfully made a complete recovery, with only mental trauma to remind me that using shampoo as lube is a major fuck up.
TL;DR:
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Wanted to spice up my faps, used shampoo. Some time later, I found out it dehydrated my nuts so badly that skin began to peel off. Use conditioner, folks at home.
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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My girlfriend of 4 months [19F] Is still pissed off with me[19M] and we have a big date today
POST: So yesterday me and my girlfriend were planning our date over the phone and after something small and stupid was said and a "couple argument" started over something small and stupid. We were both in the wrong but I apologized and just dropped everything she said without asking for an apology to save drama.
After the argument it was pretty late so I knew there wouldn't be much time to talk before one of us fell asleep so I just started being affectionate towards her and trying to lighten the mood.
My girlfriend was having none of it and told me I'm only affectionate after a fight (which I don't think is true), and that I'm only being all positive because she's mad at me.
After trying my best to cheer her up and apologize (with no apologizes on her behalf) she just went asleep on a bad note with me, which I hate because I don't want it to drag onto today.
We have a big date today and we even booked a hotel (no refund) and we need to see each other because we won't for 3 weeks after this.
I don't want to travel 2 hours on a bus to the city to see her and see that shes still pissed off at me, I'v told her this and she just said If she can handle me being a dick I should be able to handle her being negative.
As much as it looks in this post we usually are a very happy couple and she's the most affectionate, sweetest girlfriend I'v ever had so It's not like I'm dealing with a toxic person.
just want today to be positive but my girlfriend won't let go of anything and doesn't feel the need to be positive today?
I need to go but what should I do if she's still mad at me when I arrive?
TL;DR:
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Girlfriend is still mad over an argument, I'v took her feelings into concentration and apologized but she's still mad. We also have a massive date in a few hours that can't be postponed.
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